Writers Block
by TheChicaChic
Summary: It started out simple enough; write one little prompt. Who knew her life would spin so far out of control.
1. Writers Block

Authors Note: It's been awhile since I've really done any writing; aside from _These are the Moments_ and I feel like I need to work on some things. While going through some boxes, I found a book of writing prompts and decided to try them using Ruth. Of course, the hardest part is I get 10 minutes to write and I can't edit so this is all free flowing through my mind. The following story is completely AU and will not follow the storyline of the show - though moments from episodes may pop up. The prompt for this one was "_No matter what I do"_ has to begin your piece.

Let me know what you think and if I should bother continuing after this or not.

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_No matter what I do, I always manage to find the most absolute worst men to date. That's not me being dramatic; that's me telling the truth. If they aren't married then they've got some hidden quirk that is so unbelievable a relationship would never work. Not a normal quirk either like picking their nose at dinner or talking about their ex the entire first date; no, that would be something one could get over if they really liked the person. No, I'm talking about things like hacking into computer systems and causing the deaths or injuries of innocent people. Not by accident either; the deaths not the hacking; but because they were greedy. You think I'm kidding; I can just imagine the look on your face now; but I'm not. That last man that asked me to dinner made this wonderful meal. It was a stressful time; what with all that was going on; but dinner was pleasant and the conversation wasn't as strained as first dates usually are for me. Then he had to go and do something stupid like handcuff me to the banister in his front hall. Granted I was trying to call someone to put an end to his dastardly deeds but did he really need to handcuff me to the banister? If he'd wanted me in handcuffs, all he had to do was ask ... okay and not kill innocent people. That was the game changer and I knew there wouldn't be a second date. Well, that and the fact that he was dead on the floor by morning. Killed by his own greed. I think maybe I should just give up on dating. At least for awhile. It's not as though the man I dream about will ask me out to dinner; he'd rather stare at me out his office window._

Hitting publish before she could delete that last line, Ruth watched as the site updated. When she'd agreed to do this, she had promised that she'd be honest and share her true thoughts - even if the world thought she was creating a piece of fiction. Her friend had come up with the idea as a way for Ruth to express her thoughts and feelings and try to get over her shyness in opening up to people. And she did have to agree, there was something freeing about sharing her innermost thoughts in cyber land. Addison; the friend who had suggested this; had wanted her to write a book that she could publish but Ruth had been completely against the idea. Never one to be deterred, Addison had suggested the creative writing forum as a way to share the ideas and thoughts. Especially since they had workshops where prompts were given and the writers had to fit their post into the prompt.

Nervous; especially with what she saw on a daily basis; Ruth had finally consented. But only on the stipulation that she was completely anonymous. Addison had been quick to agree and so Ruth had spent an entire weekend creating a watertight legend for the fiction site. She didn't expect her colleagues or anyone else who knew her to visit the site but still, if one did, they wouldn't find a record of Ruth Evershed there. And no one but Addison would ever know her as Jamie Pearson. But being who she was, Ruth was even more careful with her identity and made sure never to use her personal PC at home or any PC in the office to access the site. Three times a week she journeyed to various Internet Cafes and logged into the site to complete her writing prompts. And each time she left she was sure to wipe the history on the PC; running a little program that Colin had written to ensure her history was never known. One could never be to safe.

Looking at her watch, she saw it was getting late. Gathering her things, she quickly stuffed them into the bag she had with her and stood from the table. If she hurried, she could get home in time to see the documentary that was airing tonight. Without taking anyone around her in, she hurried out the door never seeing the man sitting four seats over watching her.


	2. My Own Hands to Hold

Her head down, Ruth slipped through the door to the crowded Internet cafe. Barely sparing a glance at those around her, she made her way to the counter and quickly purchased the use of a computer for thirty minutes. Taking the card from the cashier, she made her way to an empty PC at the back of the cafe. Sitting at the PC, she opened up the browser window and quickly logged into the writing site; wanting to focus on something other than the image burned into her mind. Ignoring the icon showing she had mail in her writing inbox, she quickly opened the next writing prompt. Reading through the few words there, she fought back the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes again and read it a second time knowing without a doubt she wouldn't have much trouble with this one tonight.

_The sun was just dropping behind the horizon as Kayden stepped from the taxi. Leaning in the driver's window, she handed him the fare before turning towards the house. As a cool breeze blew through the air, she pulled the front of her autumn coat tightly around her; wisps of brown hair lifting gently. September was only half way over and already the evenings were chilly. As the car pulled away, she slowly made her way up the front walk. The house was dark and she knew instinctively that the owner wasn't home. Stepping into the walled garden next to the path, she took a seat on the iron bench vowing to wait until he was home. Her mind wandered back to that afternoon as a smile flitted across her lips. They'd worked together for two years now and if she was honest with herself, she'd had a slight crush on him almost since the moment she'd tripped into the conference room that first morning and he'd made an awful joke at her expense. Which really, made her seem like a teenager instead of a grown woman but she couldn't help it. Shaking her head from that thought, she went back to what he'd asked her this afternoon when they'd had a moment alone. He'd seemed nervous as they'd walked down the hall, muted noise of office drones around them and it wasn't until they'd reached an empty stairwell that he'd placed a hand lightly on her arm and asked her to wait a moment. She'd stopped and turned to look at him, __cerulean eyes meeting hazel as she waited for him to take a breath._

_"Have a coffee with me." he paused a moment, eyes imploring hers as he waited._

_"Is that a statement or a question?" she asked shyly, butterflies flapping in her stomach. Before he could answer her question though, she knew her answer. "I'd l..." she was stopped from answering as his cell phone rang and he reached into his coat pocket for it, his disappointment at the interruption on his face._

_"What?" he snapped into the phone. He listened for a second before sighing. "Gillien can't this wait? No, I know that security is important but...fine, I'll be there in ten minutes."_

_Snapping his phone shut, Pierson met her eyes. "I'm sorry...I have to go."_

_Nodding, she smiled briefly at him before he turned and walked away. She hadn't gotten a chance to give him an answer as he hadn't returned to their office for the rest of the day. Waiting until the others had left, she finally realized he wasn't coming back as the clock crept towards 6.30. Opening her computer, she looked up his home address. Gathering her things, she'd hurried out the door and towards a taxi before she could change her mind. Now she was waiting outside his house. Shivering slightly, she pulled her coat tighter as she heard a taxi pull up. Waiting in the darkness, she hoped it was him and not some nosy neighbor. As the car pulled away, she heard the sound of two people hurrying up the walk. Suddenly they were in her line of vision and she watched as the man she had come to see was shoved roughly against the door as a tall brunette assaulted his mouth with hers, her hands ripping at the tie around his neck. Kayden watched as he pulled his mouth away from the woman's and turned to the door keys in his hand. "Not here." he said, his voice hoarse._

_The woman wrapped her arms around his back and pressed her mouth against his neck, her hands sliding down the front of his chest. "Bed."_

_Opening the door, he turned back to the woman. "No Gillien." Grabbing her arm, he pulled her into his front hall. Kayden watched as he pushed her against the wall and heard his answer as he shut the door. "Wall - you'll never share my bed again."_

_Neither saw the woman sitting in the darkness, stomach in her throat as she didn't fight back the tears falling from her eyes._

Hitting publish, Ruth watched as an hour glass turned on the screen. It took a moment for the piece to filter through cyberspace and as she was waiting, she rubbed a weary hand across her red eyes, wiping away the tears that had fallen from her eyes. Shaking she logged off the site; not having the strength to read any of the messages she had received on her last piece. Tonight had been the worst night she'd had in as long as she could remember and all she wanted to do at this point was go home, sink into a hot tub of bubbles with a glass of wine and cry her eyes out. Brushing another set of tears from her eyes, she jumped as she felt a hand on her elbow. Turning quickly, she met the concerned green eyes of a man she'd never seen before.

"I'm sorry for prying but are you okay?"

His voice was deep and filled with the same concern she saw in his eyes.

"Just having a shitty day. I'll be fine once I get home and have a glass of wine."

Watching her for a moment, he nodded before offering her a slight smile. "It might seem a bit presumptuous of me but perhaps you would allow me to purchase you a tea? I know it's not wine but getting drunk has never solved anything in my experience."

She thought for a moment and almost took up his offer before she shook her head. "I'm sorry, I can't. It really wouldn't be fair to you. I won't be the best company tonight."

Reaching into his suit pocket, he pulled out a card and handed it to her. "I've seen you in here a few times and have to admit that I've wanted to ask you out a few times but never had the courage. Maybe later when you've had time to work through whatever is going on, you might take me up on the offer?"

Taking the card from him, Ruth looked at it before sliding it into her bag. "I...I'd like that."

Smiling, the man lifted her hand and pressed a light kiss against the back. "I'm Peter by the way."

"Jamie." she said, blushing.

The man stood and helped her from her chair. Reaching to the table, he picked up her bag and handed it to her. "No you're not but I'm not going to push you tonight. After all, if I was a beautiful woman, I wouldn't give my real name to a strange man I've just met either."

The comment made her laugh though it sounded slightly strangled from the tears she'd been shedding through the night.

"At least allow me to get you a taxi. It would make me feel marginally better knowing you weren't wandering the streets upset."

Hesitating a minute, she nodded. Taking her elbow, he led her from the cafe. Neither noticed the man in the corner watching them as he pulled out a cell phone and placed a call. Standing, he walked to the door as he waited for the call to connect. As he stopped by the door, watching the two people on the street, he heard the voice on the other end answer.

"There's been a development with Athena. She arrived visibly upset and just left with an unknown man."

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_**Thank you all for your reviews on the last piece. They made me smile. Hope this one doesn't disappoint too much. Poor Ruth, having to see Harry with Juliet. Today's writing prompt was use a picture to write the feelings that the image prompts in ten minutes and only ten minutes. While I didn't have an actual picture, a song I was listening to put this image in my head and it just wouldn't go away. So I just wrote about it instead. The name of the song is "My Own Hands to Hold" and is by Sara Haze.**_


	3. Unwritten

The gentle rays of morning sun danced across the wooden floor of her room. Wrapped in the warmth of her duvet, Ruth slowly opened her eyes and took a bleary look around the room. Seeing the sun spreading patterns around the room, she groaned and rolled over, pulling the pillow from under her head and smashing it over her face. After the night she had had last night, she had hoped that mother nature would have followed in her misery and granted her a day of bleakness and rain. But no, she had to go for bright and sunny. Pulling the pillow from her face, she turned her head to the left and took in the alarm clock on her bedside table. 7.08. Groaning, she rolled her head back and pulled the pillow back over her face. She'd over slept by two hours and was now going to be late but she really didn't care. A write up was the least of her problems this morning. Spending another five minutes in bed, she finally drug herself from the warmth and into the bathroom, mentally preparing herself for everything to come.

* * *

9.30 and she was finally making her way through the pods; a rarely worn pair of sun glasses covering her red eyes and a mug of coffee in her hand. Taking a glance around, she found the grid a hum of low voices. Making her way to her desk, she dropped her bag down and sunk into her chair as she took a sip of the coffee. With a sigh, she placed the cup on her desk and logged into her computer as Danny came to stand behind her. Leaning over his shoulder, he placed his mouth next to her ear and said quietly "As far as Harry is concerned, you had to stop and meet an asset this morning for Adam as he was running late with dropping Wes off." With that, he stood again and leaned against the side of her desk.

Turning in her chair, she looked up at him from behind her glasses. "Why?"

"He's like a bear with a thorn stuck in its paw this morning. Came in growling at anyone who crossed his path and he made that new intern run off the grid in tears. Seeing as you weren't here for the morning briefing, Adam jumped in and said you'd agreed to doing a favor for him this morning."

"Remind me to thank Adam later."

Danny nodded before reaching up and removing the shades covering her eyes. Taking in her red rimmed eyes before she turned her face towards her computer, he sighed and put a hand on her shoulder. "Ruth?"

"Hmmm"

Pushing slightly on her shoulder, he turned her until she faced him. Using his hand to lift her chin, he met her eyes. "What happened?"

"Nothing happened, why would you think something did?"

"You look like you've been crying."

Before she could answer, Adam and Fiona slid their chairs over, preparing to join in the conversation but were stopped as Harry bellowed out his office door. "Would any of you like to work or should we all settle in for a morning tea?"

All four glanced at each other before moving back to their work.

* * *

5.05 and they were all ready to leave. It had been a trying day; not because of any major threats or national disasters; but the tension running through the grid. Ruth had spent the day doing everything possible to avoid being alone with Harry in any sense and Harry was walking around alternating between trying to get a moment alone with Ruth and snapping at anything or anyone crossing his path. About 4 he had finally realized she was actively avoiding him and was refusing to even glance in the direction of the office. As he reached for his phone, his hand paused over it as he noticed the four people standing around her desk.

Fiona, Adam, Danny and Malcolm were all putting their coats on as they stood around their co-worker, waiting for her to realize they were there. All had seen the redness in her eyes as well as the sadness plaguing her and it wasn't hard to figure out that whatever had happened had to do with their boss. It wasn't like Ruth to spend the entire day hiding from him. But she had. And now they were all worried about her.

Glancing up from the file she had just closed, she jumped slightly at being surrounded. "What's wrong?"

Fiona glanced at the guys before meeting Ruth's eyes again. "We're concerned about you. We all know something happened but have no idea what and we're worried."

Smiling slightly, she met all four sets of eyes. "I'll be fine; you don't have to worry about me."

Danny was the first to answer as he met her eyes. "But we do worry about you."

"Yes Ruth, we all worry about you. You're family."

Ruth turned to Malcolm, smiling a bit more at his response. Before she could answer, Adam jumped in.

"This job; no one understands it like those who work with us; and because of that we develop close bonds. So when something's bothering one of us, the rest want to help."

"Tell us you wouldn't feel the same way if there was something wrong with one of us?" Fiona asked.

Fighting back the tears that had become her newest friend last night, she looked at all of them. "Thank you guys but I...I can't talk about it here."

Danny held up her coat that he had grabbed from the rack she had hung it on that morning. Holding it open so she could slide into it, he smiled at her. Malcolm reached over and shut down her computer as Fiona grabbed her bag.

"Well than, how about crappy food and good drinks over at the George? You can tell us what Harry's done." Adam paused at her blush and the sad look that settled on her face again. "We can kill him if that'd make it better." He continued, only kidding slightly.

Fiona smacked her husband before wrapping an arm around Ruth's shoulders and leading her to the pods. "Ignore my husband, he means well."

Ruth managed a laugh as she looked at the four people surrounding her. For the first time since her father died, she felt like she had people who honestly cared about her. And while she would be embarrassed to admit to them what had happened the night before, she had a feeling they wouldn't fully judge her.

Harry watched as the five people left, a frown on his face. It wasn't the first time in the two years that she'd worked for him that she had avoided him but it was the first time since her secondment from GCHQ had become permanent. Yesterday he'd finally worked up the courage to ask her for coffee and he could have sworn she'd been about to say yes. At least before they'd been interrupted by the damn phone call from Juliet.

_Juliet_. Just the thought of her name brought a feeling of disgust. Last night had been a colossal mistake on his part; one brought on by too much whiskey at the impromptu meeting and frustrated thoughts of Ruth and yet another missed chance. But God, what had prompted him to do _that_? Screwing Juliet was a mistake he'd made over and over again in his first marriage and though he wasn't married to Ruth _yet_, the thought had entered his mind lately. But he had screwed up and everything was pointing to the face that Ruth knew.

Sitting back in his chair, he ran a weary hand over his face and pulled open his bottom desk drawer. Reaching in, he pulled out the floral scarf he'd found on the bench in his front yard this morning and lifted it to his nose. Breathing in the scent he had come to associate with Ruth, he closed his eyes and held the scarf tightly, the image of it wrapped loosely around her neck as he'd tried to ask her out in the stairwell the day before. Oh God, he had screwed up big time.

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_**Well, I'm supposed to be writing for ten minutes a day and since I missed yesterday due to work and traveling to my mum's, today I've gone and done two chapters. This one doesn't really have much of a point but continuing where the last chapter left off. Ruth doesn't actually visit the writing site this chapter but she should be back there again tomorrow. The prompt was to write why you were late for a meeting. Not too happy with how it flows but no editing and I have to share what I write.**_

_**Thanks to all who provided reviews on the last chapter already. NatesDate I honestly thought that Peter and the guy watching would be the same person but a little plot line has slowly unraveled in my mind and I think you'll be surprised the way the story goes if it keeps following the same path as its going now.**_


	4. I Saw You

_**This did not go exactly as I planned and I would say this slipped into M territory though not in how one would hope. I don't know what I was thinking when this came to me except two hours alone in a car with an iPod that will only play angst music brought this on.  
**_

* * *

Head bent over his desk, Harry knew the exact moment she stepped up to his door. He didn't have to look up to know who was there; the air seemed to take on a charged feeling and he could feel her eyes burring into the top of his head. It had been a month since he'd been anywhere near her alone; Danny or Fiona had taken to bringing him the files she was working on and if by some chance she _did_ have to brief him on something outside of the daily briefings, someone always seemed to be with her. That's not to say he hadn't tried to get a moment a lone with her but it seemed like the universe and those on the Grid were conspiring to ensure that didn't happen. Even Malcolm; his oldest friend; had refused to assist him with his endeavor. Instead in as simple terms as he could muster, Malcolm had told him to back off and leave her alone; that he'd done more than enough to hurt her. It had gotten to the point that he was ready to chance showing up on her doorstep one night if he didn't think it'd only make things worse.

And now here she stood at his door. Taking a slow, deep breath he laid the pen in his hand down on the desk before raising his head to look at her. She hadn't entered the office like she would in the past but stood in the doorway, a piece of paper twisted in her hands. Not trusting himself to speak, he motioned her in; taking in that she wouldn't meet his eyes as she crossed from the door and sat on the edge of a chair in front of his desk. He waited for what felt like an hour before she nervously handed him a piece of paper; never speaking a word as she continued to look at his desk. Reaching a hand out, he took the paper from her and pulled it back, his eyes settling on the writing at the top. As his mind fully worked out the words on the paper, his stomach dropped and it took most of his self control to keep his hands from shaking. Swallowing twice, he finally felt moisture coat his suddenly dry throat and lifted his eyes, finally meeting hers.

"I would appreciate that being pushed through sooner rather than later."

He saw her lips moving and in a distant part of his mind, he heard what she was saying but for the life of him, he didn't want to comprehend. For a month he'd been longing to talk to her, to try and explain what had happened but as he met her eyes, the warmth he had come to depend on was non-existent. Ice met his gaze and his heart dropped to meet his already low stomach.

"Ruth, I...that is...are you...I...we..." he couldn't form sentence as he watched her. Swallowing again, he looked at the paper before looking up at her again. "Can we talk? Please?" He finally got out, though so softly he wondered if she had even heard him.

Hands gripping the material of her skirt tightly, she kept her gaze on his. "I don't think we have anything to talk about. I'd like you to sign that" she said, nodding at the paper in his hands "so I can move on with my life."

Before he could answer, he heard a voice at the door, one that made him go even colder. He watched as the woman in the chair across from him turned and looked at his open door and though he didn't know how it was even possible, her demure turned colder. Standing briskly, she moved stiffly across the room without a word. Sliding past the other woman, she hurried across the grid and to her desk.

It was only as he heard the click of his office door lock that Harry looked from the vacant chair and met the eyes of his biggest mistake. He couldn't read her face as she crossed the room and sat in the chair Ruth had so hastily vacated. Looking over her shoulder, he tried to find Ruth on the Grid but realized that his blinds were pulled at such an angle he couldn't look out. Lying the paper clutched between his fingers on the desk, he folded his hands together and took a moment to get his emotions under control again.

"What do you want Juliet?"

"I thought perhaps we could pick up where we left off a month ago. Jonathan has been out of town and I've been a bit..._lonely._"

"Perhaps you should call your husband and tell him that. What happened between us was a mistake." he looked back down at the papers on his desk.

"We've never been a mistake Harry. Quite the contrary, we've always been damned good together." Sliding off her shoes, she flexed her toes as she watched him.

"Good or not, I'm not interested in another quick fuck."

"Oh Harry, you don't mean that."

Lifting his head, he met her eyes. "If that's all you're here for Juliet, then I suggest you leave. I'm entirely too busy to play these games."

Smirking slightly, she slid her bare foot up his leg, feeling the fabric bunch slightly as she moved across his hard thigh. Her smirk grew as she flexed her toes against his trouser covered crotch and felt him shudder. "Your body may disagree with you." Curling her toes, she slowly massaged him, her eyes watching his as he tried to keep his body under control. The smirk turned to a full out grin as she felt him harden significantly from her ministrations. Pushing harder against his erection, she heard him moan slightly and grinned harder. He pushed her foot back and she watched as he breathed a bit harder. trying to get himself under control. Not giving him a chance to gather his thoughts, she slipped from the chair and slithered under his desk. Sliding her hands up his thighs, she quickly undid his trousers and slipped her hand inside.

"Stop." he managed through clenched teeth, his hands sliding down to grip her heard intending to push her away but all thought went out of his mind as her mouth closed around him. Tangling his hands through her hair, his head fell back against his chair as her she moved over him. Losing himself in the pleasure of what she was doing, he let his mind wander as he held her in place. God, why did he do this to himself was his last coherent thought as she raked her teeth along the length of him. Shuddering, he let his head fall back further, his lip curling up at the feeling coursing through him as he moaned deep in his throat. Gripping her hair harder in his hands, he felt his climax course through him as he shuddered and moaned louder than before. "_Ruth" _ left his parted lips and he sagged against the chair, his hands shaking against the arms as fought to get his breath back.

Juliet climbed out from under the desk and sat in the chair across from him, a smirk forming on her lips again. One would have expected her to be angry at the name that clearly wasn't hers slipping out of his mouth while she did _that_ to him but on the contrary, she had gotten what she had needed. Ammunition against Harry Pearce in the most unexpected ways. She watched him for a moment and saw as his eyes met hers finally aware of what happened.

Harry felt disgusted with himself as he fixed himself and watched Juliet sitting across from him. Sliding his gaze from hers, he looked over her shoulder at the windows and felt relief course through him as he saw the blinds were still slanted. Juliet turned and followed his gaze, a smile spreading across her face as she felt his relief. Turning back to him, she started laughing as she stood.

"Oh Harry, just because you can't see out doesn't mean _they_ can't see in." Crossing the room, she stopped by the blinds and turned them until he could see onto the Grid. His stomach plummeted to his toes as he saw the eyes of his staff turned towards the office; shock on most of their faces at what they had apparently just witnessed. Sliding his gaze further, he met the eyes of Adam who looked disgusted and finally Ruth who not only looked disgusted but crestfallen as well. Tearing his gaze away he watched as Juliet crossed his office and stopped at the door. As she slid the lock open she turned back to him. "It's been enlightening Harry, we _will_ have to do that again."

Without giving him a chance to answer, she slipped out the door and crossed the Grid. Stopping by Ruth's desk, she met the other woman's eyes, a smirk reaching her eyes as she leaned down and spoke loud enough for all to hear. "I think Harry's coming for you Ruth." With that, she laughed as she walked out through the pods.

Ruth felt the color filling her cheeks and looked up hopelessly at Adam. He met her gaze before looking around at everyone else. "Alright everyone, out. I don't think _anyone_ is going to argue with all of us having an early night." As he said that, he turned back towards Harry's office and met the man's gaze. After a moment, he pulled it away and looked around as no one moved. "NOW!"

With that, everyone jumped up and hurriedly gathered their things. Crossing the short distance to Ruth's desk, he took her arm and pulled her from her chair. Shuffling her towards the pods where Danny and Malcolm were waiting, he didn't spare another glance at the office.

Harry watched as everyone left, and slowly he let his head fall to the top of his desk, the disgust he had felt a few minutes before filling him even more. It'd be a miracle if she ever spoke to him again and the longer he sat there, he realized that not only had he let the one woman he loved cared deeply for down but he'd also just violated about a dozen workplace codes in front of his entire staff. Reaching down to his bottom desk drawer, he opened it and pulled out the flower scarf resting on top. Holding it to his face, he felt tears in the corner of his eyes as the depth of how much he screwed up reached his mind.

* * *

Still shaking two hours later, Ruth slipped into the cafe in a daze. In the course of a month, she felt like her entire world had come crashing down upon her. Sliding into the chair in front of a computer, she rested her head against the table briefly and closed her eyes. How much more was she expected to take? Pressing her fingers against the tears that slipped to the corner of her eyes, she took a deep breath and pushed the images burned into her mind back. Feeling a hand resting gently against her shoulder, she lifted her head and smiled at the man who sat next to her.

"Hi Peter." she said, her voice more steady than she felt.

"Hello Jamie." a smile crossing his features. Leaning forward, he pressed his lips softly against her cheek before settling back in his chair.

Taking a deep breath, she pushed another man from her mind and vowed to move on with her life like she had asked to earlier. Shakily she pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "It's Ruth actually." she said softly, meeting his gaze fully for the first time.

"Ruth" he tested her name on his lips before his smile grew. "Hello _Ruth_."

Both were engrossed in the other before them that they didn't see the man four seats over watching them. Turning back to his computer, he opened the email program and quickly sent a message out to his cohorts. _Athena has arrived - things progressing with Erebos - awaiting direction._

* * *

_**This was a lot harder to write than I had initially thought it was and I am thoroughly disgusted with Harry right this second even if it's the Harry in my head. The prompt for this writing was toxic and in my opinion at this point, there is nothing more toxic than the "relationship" Harry seems to have with Juliet. Review please ... they make my day.**_


	5. One Little Step

_**The prompt for this one was for romantic gestures and it's all Ruth's thoughts on this one. After the last chapter, I needed to do something and this refused to let me go. So I've taken the last ten minutes and written it. It's not been proofed at all as I literally have to be to work in five minutes. Gah. Reviews are lovely.**_

* * *

_I'm not the type of girl who normally finds herself on the receiving end of romantic gestures. How could I be when I can count the number of men I've had more than one date with on one hand with a finger or two to spare. And yet, in the past month I've found myself being...courted for lack of better word...by two different men. One I've only just met and while the gestures have been sweet, they've been so generic. A red rose on our first date, gentle kisses on the back of my hand, pulling my chair out for me as we sit down to dinner; little things have so much meaning and yet so little in return. The second; how I've longed for him to do something other than stare at me out his window. We were so close; I could feel it in my blood; and yet he ruined that. Or so I had honestly believed. But I should have none deep in my soul that I could come to forgive him. Oh he doesn't know that yet and he won't for some time but I know that eventually I'll forgive him. After all, as much as it pains me, we weren't dating; I had no claim to him whatsoever; so he could sleep with whomever he pleased. But the sight of him shoving her against his wall; God it felt like someone had ripped my heart out. It only got worse that afternoon when she...did __**that**__ to him in his office for all to see. He's punished himself for that though he thinks no one is the wiser. Being who he is, he couldn't suspend himself but instead he's scheduled himself for extra overnight shifts and the long weekends; allowing others to spend time with their loved ones. He's also given up whiskey; the bottles on his desk never changing in volume. There have been other little things and I honestly think he feels remorse._

_And now this prompt on romantic gestures has gone so off course. I didn't mean for it to and yet my mind wandered. As I said, I've never been the girl to receive romantic gestures. And yet, I think I'm being swept off my feet. Not by P...as I said, he's been sweet but it's been so generic. The __**other**__ one has been ten steps closer to my heart. Two weeks after that incident in which we at work had barely seen him, I opened my desk drawer and found three single flowers resting there, a single piece of paper resting on top. In handwriting I've come to know as well as my own, I read the brief message there. 'A purple hyacinth to say I'm sorry, a primrose to say I can't live without you, and a blue violet to say I'll always be true.' I'd looked up at his office and briefly met his eyes, the sorrow shining through even across the distance of ... office. Those flowers had found their way home at the end of the day and are currently resting pressed between the pages of __**Persuasion**__ along with the two flowers I'd found two days later. I've always been the girl who doesn't like roses. Don't get me wrong, they're beautiful but they seem so over done. P gave one to me and as I said, it was sweet. But __**he**__ gave me flowers that mean so much more. A hyacinth, a primrose, and a violet all with meaning behind them but he'd also found my favorite flowers and instead of hiding them in my desk drawer this time, he'd somehow managed to slip them into my lunch bag that had been sitting in the fridge in the kitchenette. How I don't know because I'd been in the office the entire day and I'd never seen him move across the office let alone carrying two flowers. But as I pulled out my salad, I had found two carnations; a light red and a dark red. As with the others, a note accompanied these. 'Light red for admiration and a dark red for a deeper feeling of love and affection. You've take my heart and though I don't want it back, I hope one day to be honored with claiming yours.' I almost cried as I read that. You can't go telling a girl she owns your heart in front of all her colleagues. I had to lie when they asked what was wrong as I'd gasped._

_But the most incredible gesture of all so far had to be what I found this morning lurking in my desk. It had been quiet for the past few days and work was slow. Something odd in our field but it had given us all the chance to get caught up on so much. I'd reached into the desk for a new pen and my handle had stopped, hovering over the cream colored envelope resting there, my name scrawled so carefully across the front. With a trembling hand, I pulled it out and opened it slowly. Inside were two tickets for the long awaited classical tour at the British Museum. It had been talked about for years and the anticipation had been unbelievable for the private showings that would be occurring for two weeks only. Tickets were impossible to get and I had thought beyond a doubt that I'd miss this. And yet he gave them to me. With the tickets was a note so carefully written. I'd pulled it out and the words did make me cry. 'I've had these for some months now with the hope that I'd get to take you but I know that's not possible now. I can't go without you as I was only looking forward to the job it'd bring on your face. As much as it pains me to say, please take these and enjoy them with ... your other. X' My heart broke and leapt at the same time if that's possible and it was in that second I knew he'd been forgiven. But now I'm stuck...I don't know who I'm going to take.  
_


	6. Guts

_**Hi everyone - thanks for the reviews so far. =0) I think I've finally figured out where this is going and can start working my way there. This little bit is filler to get to where it's slowly been leading. Next chapter we get to really see Peter and the mystery man is back again.**_

_**The prompt for this one was write an email. Not as easy as I thought to fit it in.  
**_

_**I'm in need of some prompts that Ruth can purely write on for the site. About five or ten - any suggestions would be wonderful.  
**_

* * *

Pen held over paper, Harry looked up from the stack of papers on his desk and watched as Ruth tucked the hair behind her ear for the fifth time that afternoon. It'd been a two weeks since he'd left the tickets in her desk. Which meant that the exhibition had been the night before. Part of him was wondering what she had thought of it; if her face had lit up in joy as she moved from each piece; but the other part of him was dying to know she'd gone with someone else. He'd so badly wanted to take her and a small part of him had hoped as she thawed towards him slightly that she'd ask him to go with her but she hadn't.

He knew she had enjoyed it if the smile on her face that morning was anything to go by. She'd been positively glowing as she'd walked onto the Grid and his battered heart had soared at the thought that she'd enjoyed it. Until his brain had kicked in and reminded him that it may not have been the exhibition that had her glowing; probably _wasn't_ the exhibition that had her glowing but rather the man she'd been seeing lately. _Peter Morgan, Solicitor._ When the vetting had taken place, Harry had been tortured himself with the information and read the file from cover to cover. Damned man was perfect from his schooling to his charitable good deeds to his gene pool. Not one negative thing had been found other than some speeding tickets. He'd seen the pictures too; tall with thick black hair and green eyes; the man was built like David Beckham. And he had Ruth.

Shaking his head, he watched Ruth as she lifted her head and met his eyes, a small smile on her face. He smiled back before looking back at his papers, trying to turn his thoughts back to the reports. But it was no use. He wanted to know what she thought of the exhibit. Before he could change his mind, he turned to his computer and opened his email program.

**To: Ruth Evershed**  
**From: Harry Pearce**  
**Subject: Exhibit?**

**I hope you won't find it intrusive but I remember that the exhibit was last night. Did you and Peter enjoy it?**

Hitting send, he turned back to his papers, careful to avoid looking out the window. As he scrawled his signature across the latest operational costs report, he head the quiet ping of his inbox and turned back to the screen. His heart leapt as he saw the new message.

**To: Harry Pearce**  
**From: Ruth Evershed**  
**Subject: Re: Exhibit?**

**It was wonderful. They had so many classical pieces that I'd never seen before. Actually, they had so many pieces that I didn't see them all. There's talk that there'll be another showing next year but I only heard that in passing. I'm so happy that I got to go. Thank you for the tickets.**

Ruth watched as he read the message; glad that they were starting to get back on an even keel. She had planned on asking him to go with her to the museum but in the end, she didn't know if she was quite ready to spend time alone with him. They'd just gotten to a point where she could talk to him at work without seeing him pinning Juliet to his entry wall but that didn't mean she'd entirely forgiven him. Of course, that didn't mean that she'd gone with Peter like he assumed. Somehow that had felt so _wrong_. Harry had gotten her those tickets, he had wanted to take her and she felt like she'd be betraying him if she had taken Peter. She wasn't going to tell him that though; it wouldn't hurt for him to feel a fraction of what she'd been feeling that last two months. No, instead she'd found the perfect date. She smiled as she thought of Wes Carter in his suit, all dressed up and as suave as his father.

* * *

_I love Wes and I thought that him being her date would be a nice, neutral person who wasn't Harry and wasn't Peter._


	7. Last Kiss

_**Thank you for the ideas for writing prompts - they'll be helpful over the next few days as I write as "Ruth". And thank you for the reviews as well. Like always, they make me smile. I know I promised another entrance of the mystery man but that isn't going to happen until I move onto the next story chapter which won't happen until I've done some more random prompts that the story calls for to work correctly. Sorry for the lack of...story in this but it's setting up for the next act of the major plot. **_

_** If you've any ideas for prompts - send them over. I love the interactive part that this can bring.**_

_**The prompt for this was first kiss though the title came from the song 'Last Kiss' by Pearl Jam.**_

* * *

_ First kiss - that could be taken in so many different ways. Do they mean your first kiss with a boy, the first time you've kissed a new boyfriend or the first time you kissed a girl, the first time you've kissed someone after you realize you're in love with them, or do they mean something as mundane at the first time your parents kissed you? Because I can guarantee you I don't remember that no matter how hard I try. So which one do they mean?_

_ The first time a boy kissed me we were 15 years old. We'd been friends for years; a mismatched pair if one could be found. He was tall; well over 6 foot even then; with black hair and eyes of the color of chocolate. I was short; barely over five foot; with brown hair and blue eyes. He was a rugby player whereas I almost always had my nose buried in a book; but we were close. He turned out to be my first boyfriend and the first man I'd ever loved. It was awkward, clumsy and oh so sweet. We were walking through a park one Saturday afternoon. He was walking me home from a play that our school was doing and as we stopped by the duck pond, he reached out for my hand and held it. I can't remember exactly how long we stood there silently, watching as the ducks chased each other through the water but eventually he looked at me and I looked at him and he just slowly leaned forward and pressed his mouth against mine. It lasted maybe thirty seconds but at that moment I didn't care. Part of me wonders if we'd still be together if circumstances had been different; he understood me so well and never pushed for anything; and there are times when I'm lonely that I just want to call him and say...hi. I know that's not possible; I don't think his boyfriend would like me showing up on their front porch and asking for another chance._

_ The relationship I'm in now is different. Our first kiss felt rushed; nothing like what I expected or even like. He'd been so sweet through his initial courtship; kissing the back of my hand, pulling out chairs at the Internet cafe, walking me to taxis when I was ready to leave; that sort of thing. But that first night, when I told him my real name and agreed to have dinner with the next night. He'd walked me out to catch a taxi like he normally did, he hand resting softly against my lower back. He'd opened the door for me. We'd stepped out into the cool, October evening and he led me down the block some to a better vantage point for catching a taxi. As we waited, he'd looked at me and before I even knew what was happening, his lips were pressed hard against mine, his tongue demanding entrance to my mouth. To say I was shocked would have been an understatement. But then it was over, and he was looking at me strangely. Before I even had time to contemplate a question, he'd brushed a soft hand against the side of my face and said he was sorry, that he didn't know what came over him. It was surreal but since then, it's never been the same. He's always been so soft, so sweet, so gentle as he's kissed me goodnight._

_ There are times I wonder what it would be kissed by the one. Alright, there are times I've dreamed what our first kiss would be like but there are so many factors that I can't know. Would it be soft, sweet and gentle? Would it be hard, fast and completely inappropriate? Or would it be something in between? Of course, chances of it happening now are so limited. He's hurt me so much without even trying and I've pushed him away so much for things I had no right to push him away for that we're so far apart, I can't see us ever finding our way back to where we were. And that makes me so sad even though it shouldn't; not when I have this seemingly wonderful man who wants to be with me. These thoughts shouldn't even be in my head, let alone on this site. And there I go rambling again about my life and feelings; something you the reader could probably give a damn about._


	8. Baby Love

_**Good evening everyone! Thank you for the lovely reviews from those who read the last chapter - you are all the bestest. And thank you to NatesDate for the prompt for this little piece; it was truly an inspiring topic to come up with a story for. I'm getting closer to Act II of this little venture and I hope that you're enjoying it as well. Soon more shall be revealed. But until then, more Ruth writing her little prompts - and making a slight little slip of the tongue so to say to her secret identity.**_

_**The prompt for this piece was "You dream you're having twins." Can you just imagine Ruth with two little twins?**_

* * *

_My day started out like any other day; hard and fast. In my job, you come to expect you'll be working all hours of the day for days on end with no rest and those hours can begin at any time. Too often I'm drug from the depths of sleep by the screaming of my alarm clock; wrapped in the lilac duvet that covers my lonely bed and from the warmth of those last twinges of an early morning dream. This morning was no different from every other day though that last morning dream, I think a part of my will hold onto that for a long time to come._

_I don't know all the details as I only remember the last few minutes but those last few moments were something I know I've dreamed about before but it's the first time I've had that particular type of dream in years. I suppose that most woman who aren't opposed to children dream of being pregnant one day so it's really not out of the ordinary._

_It was mid afternoon as the sun played across the floor; light chasing shadow as the wind gently rocked the trees outside. It's autumn; my favorite time of year; and the windows are open letting the chilling breeze filter into the house bringing the crisp scent of burning wood and old leaves lying on the ground. I'm curled into the corner of the couch, a smile on my face as my hands stroke lovingly over my slightly rounded stomach. It's not huge yet and even though it's a short dream, I somehow know that I haven't felt them move yet but the feeling is comforting. Before I get too comfortable though, a hand slides around my shoulders and settles over mine rubbing slow circles as my head falls back and leans against his stomach. It's relaxing and we stay like that for a few minutes before he presses a kiss against my hair and speaks in a voice I know so well but yet don't have quite the chance to put a name to._

_"So...we're having twins?"_

_And then I woke up. Not by choice mind you but by the decision of the alarm to blaringly say "Good morning R_ and welcome to yet another day where you don't quite get to see your future". Unlike most mornings though, I slammed my hand down on the clock hard enough to break it and rolled back into the pillow, thinking about what had just transpired in my dream._

_In all sense of the word I was getting what I'd always secretly dreamed off. A baby; well in this case two; and apparently a significant other as well. I should have been terrified at the thought of two babies; double the crying, double the feeding, double the dirty diapers; but at the same time double the cuddles, double the kisses on scraped elbows, and double the joy on a small little face. As I laid there in the comfort of my bed, I let my mind wander to what they would look like; would they have my eyes and their father's hair, would they have his height and my stature, or would they be a complete blend of us that two entirely unique individuals would be created out of love? I didn't have a further chance to contemplate the idea of two babies because my phone rang bringing forth the real world. But as I pushed aside the duvet and slipped my feet to the floor, I was left with one fleeting thought - who was their father?_


	9. Everything's Good

_They say that as you pass from one life to another, your entire life passes you by. Moments of pure joy and pure misery, pure love and pure hatred, and all those moments in between. Things we've long since forgotten suddenly find their way out of the recess of our minds and we see those moments for what they really were. I suppose we see things more clearly in those moments and are forced to face both our triumphs and our regrets. And it's in those moments that we realize we're either content with where we're going or we're not._

_I watched a movie once called 'Afterlife'. It was Japanese. The basic idea of the movie was that after you die, you have three days to pick the one memory in your life that you want to take with you and then everything else will be erased. It doesn't say exactly that it has to be a happy memory but if that's the only memory that you get to take with you, then just maybe it should be a happy memory. Or at least that's my thought. But really, what __is__ a happy memory? Is it the same for each person? I don't think so._

_It's taken me awhile to decide exactly what my happy memory would be. Was it when I first walked into the meeting room at my current job on that first day; late and nervous? Dropping those files onto the floor as To...Terrier tried to shake my hand and the one made a bad joke about my job position? Maybe it was that last summer my father was alive and those happy memories I have. No, because I know in an instant that my father is already waiting for me and we'll have time to create new memories together - as long as I'm allowed to remember who he is and he can remember me. It has been such a long time. Or was it when I graduated from Oxford - no, while that was a happy moment, it's not __the__ moment I want to remember._

_I could be a bit morbid and say it's when I realized that I lo...liked the one a lot. It'd only be morbid though because it was when I received the phone call that he'd been shot and for a split second, I thought he was dead. That wasn't the happy moment; it was when I saw him after finding out he was alive. Sure I couldn't actually touch or talk to him but I could see him and he was alive and the breath that had been holding into my chest seemed to whoosh out. I knew then what he meant to me and the lengths I'd go to to help him. Of course that was the first time I really felt like a spook; lying to that nurse and telling her I was having an affair with him and was pregnant with his child. No, I don't think that's the memory I'd like to take with me._

_You know, I think the moment I'd like to have with me for the rest of my eternal life is when I told him about this system I'd put into place. It involved the use of various taxis around the city and supplementing our resources for pool cars. He'd paused for a moment questioning exactly what they were and I had to admit what I'd been doing. I don't know what I was expecting but when he praised me and mentioned initiative, the look he gave me; it brought flutters to my stomach. For a splattering of seconds, I think I forgot how to breath. No one had ever looked at me like that and no one has ever since. A look of pride, of wonder and love though I think I've come to the realization that the last one was probably just a bit of imagination on my part. But that doesn't matter because I'll hold onto the figment of imagination for the rest of my life and afterlife. To feel that warmth and giddiness that it brought into me._

* * *

_**AN: I think I'm going to be sad once this story is done. It's really an enjoyable processing trying to learn about a character while creating a story. The stories not done yet, it's got some ways to go but I can also see the end looming. =0( The prompt for this one came from the book 'Now Write! Fiction writing exercises from today's best writers and teachers. It called for the writer to pick a memory that their character would have to take with them to their afterlife. I've never seen the movie mentioned above but it was the example used in the book.**_

_**Please review, it makes me all smiley. =0)**_


	10. Mr Brightside

_**Two in one night - that's what an early day at work will get you. This is a bit longer than the past couple of chapters - and I'm a bit nervous as I've shifted the story now to where I had always planned on it going. I think...a few things might start to make more sense now and I'm curious to see what people think. Please let me know whether you like it or not.**_

_**The prompt for this started out as 'Silk Blouse' from HR always lives on but it spiraled out of control really fast from there and now I'm not too sure what the prompt was. So I'm thinking that this one is more promptless and I'll save Silk Blouse for later.**_

* * *

Covertly Harry stood to the side of the window in his office, watching as Ruth typed at her computer. He felt like he was locked in a cage; kept away from all those he cared about; for some unspoken crime. Except he knew what his crime was. It'd been two months since he'd tried to ask her on a date and ruined that chance all in the swoop of one day. And from what he'd managed to find out, it'd been two months since she had met Peter. Even the thought of the name caused a shudder to ripple through his body. Okay, so perhaps it was wrong that he was digging into the how, when, where, and why Ruth had met this other man; how he meant enough that she'd turn in a permission to socialize form; but he was her boss, he was allowed to be concerned for the welfare of his department. The man could be an International Terrorist set on turning a member of section D for information - or worse yet, he could be _American_. That thought just made him sick. American.

But he was doing this for national security and not because he was jealous. After all, from what he'd found out, the man had approached Ruth in an Internet Cafe and struck up a conversation. On the night he'd tried to ask her out. If he hadn't been a weak excuse for a man and not taken Juliet back to his house, _he_ could be the one taking her to dinner and museums. But no, he had to think with his dick and not with his brain or his heart. Stupid, stupid man. This Peter fellow was dating his Ruth, kissing his Ruth, peeling the silk blouse off his Ruth and all because he wanted five minutes of instant gratification. Bloody typical. Oh who was he kidding, he was a jealous fool. A jealous fool who was forced to hide in the shadows of his office watching her through a window just for a glimpse of her bright smile.

She was wearing a silk blouse today in a burgundy. It was new; he'd never seen her wear it before; and in the two years she'd worked for Section D, he had come to know almost every piece of clothing she had. At least those that were visible and meant for work. He'd not been blessed to see what hid underneath her trousers, skirts, and blouses. But he knew this burgundy blouse was not one of them. He would definitely remember it with the way it caught the natural high lights in her hair, the way it brought out her complexion, the way it hugged her curves without looking trashy. No, this blouse was new. Which meant it was for _Peter_. Damned man.

"Reduced to leering like a lovesick teenager. What has happened to you Harry?"

Harry turned at the voice in his doorway and grimaced; wondering what he had done to encourage a visit from her.

"What do you want Juliet?"

She moved into the office and started to close the door.

"No, leave the door open." Harry said as he turned to the blinds he had just been lurking behind. Pulling them to the top, he met Ruth's eye as she watched the office and he offered a small smile. She offered one back before looking back at the computer screen in front of him. Hope soared through his chest and it gave him a newfound strength to deal with whatever Juliet wanted now. Turning back to the room, he saw her standing by his desk, a gleam in her eyes. Steeling himself for what was to come, he crossed the room and sat at his desk, crossing his legs before gesturing to the chair across from the desk. One he had conveniently moved a few inches further away. He was done making stupid mistakes.

* * *

Ruth watched as Juliet stepped onto the Grid. The woman was a damned pimple - always popping up at the most inopportune moments. What would it take to get rid of her? The traditional methods obviously weren't working and Ruth wondered briefly if they could just pop her. Be done with the nightmare. Taking a sip of water, she knew the exact moment Harry saw the walking zit. She heard his voice clearly across the grid as he demanded that the door be left open. That was a change of pace as were the blinds being pulled to the top of their holders. She met his eye and saw his smile; small though it was; and she granted him one back. Apparently the man was trying.

Looking at her computer clock, she gasped at the time. 5.24 - she was supposed to meet Peter for dinner at 7 at a restaurant clear across town; something new, hip, and upcoming. He'd been dying for weeks to go and she'd finally relented even if it was somewhere if given the choice, she wouldn't dine at. But if she didn't leave now, she'd be seriously late and there'd be another fight. Shutting down the PC, she slid the files she'd been working with into her desk and locked the drawer. Grabbing her purse and coat, she said goodnight to everyone and hurried off the grid; casting one final glance towards Harry's office as she reached the pods. For a moment her eyes met his and she paused watching as something flickered briefly across his face before it disappeared. Gracing him with another small smile, she lifted her hand and waved goodbye in acknowledgement before slipping out through the pods.

* * *

Peter was not a happy man when she arrived. She'd been late getting to the restaurant due to an accident on one of the main streets and he'd been forced to sit at their table waiting for twenty minutes for her to arrive. As the maître pulled the chair out for her to sit, Ruth saw the angry eyes meeting hers from across the table. Thanking the man as he pushed the chair in, she offered a smile to her date.

"I'm so sorry I was late, there was an accident blocking Central London and traffic was a nightmare."

"Maybe if you left work at a decent hour you wouldn't have to worry about these things."

"My being late had nothing to do with work and everything to do with the traffic."

"Right and the last four dates you've had to cancel had nothing to do with work either."

"Peter, you _know_ I work for the government. I can't just walk out whenever I please. If I'm asked to stay, then I have to stay. I'm sorry I've had to cancel lately but things have been busy and I couldn't get away. Surely you can understand that."

Before he had a chance to respond, the waiter made his way to the table and asked if they were ready to order. Blushing as she hadn't had a chance to even glance at the menu, Ruth quickly looked over the offerings. Finally settling on a salad with salmon, she waited Peter ordered and the waiter stepped away. Reaching across the table, she slid her fingers over his, gripping them in hers.

"I really am sorry I was late. I purposely left work early tonight because I knew how important this was to you and I wanted to get here before you. The idiotic drivers of London had other ideas though."

"I'm done talking about this." he said, moving his hand from hers and reaching for his glass of wine. "There's something else that I want to talk to you about."

A bit hurt at his obvious rejection, Ruth pulled her hand back to her side of the table and picked up her napkin. Watching his eyes, she twisted the cloth in her fingers. "What's that?"

"Your hesitation towards sex. We've been seeing each other for two months now and frankly, I'm tired of waiting."

"Peter," she paused, the napkin twisting tighter around her fingers. "When we started dating, I..I told you about my feelings towards..._that_. It's not something I can rush into and I'm just not ready."

"Stop being such a child Ruth. It's just sex. You need to grow up and get over whatever idealism you have about it and how it has to be something special between two people."

She blushed as she looked down at the table, unable to meet his eyes as his voice got slightly louder and angrier. "And stop calling it _that._ It's sex Ruth. You're a grown woman - use the damn word."

"Peter please, you're embarrassing me." she said quietly, lifting her eyes to meet his.

"Peter please, you're embarrassing me." he mimicked. Standing, he threw his napkin on the table. "I'm going to the rest room. I'll return when I feel like it."

As he angrily made his way across the crowded dining room, Ruth looked at her hands and fought back tears. The people sitting closest to the table were looking at her and she wished the floor would swallow her up. Feeling the blush burning her skin from her chest to the roots of her hair, she hastily wiped the tears that had made their way to her eyes. Had she looked up and to the left, she would have seen the man sitting four tables watching her.

Slowly reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his cell phone. Dialing a familiar number, he waited until the call connected. Never taking his eyes off of Ruth, he spoke softly.

"It's time to move the plan up and bring in Zeus." Pausing a moment as the person on the other end spoke, he shook his head, forgetting that the other person couldn't see. "No, Erebos is starting to worry me. Athena may be at risk. Send Zeus the files."

Hanging up the phone, he looked at his dining companion. "I hope we're doing the right thing."

* * *

Though Peter had returned from the rest room calmer, the rest of the evening had been strained. Ruth tried to enjoy the enjoy the salmon; she really did; but after the scene before dinner, it had settled like lead in her stomach. As Peter signed the check, Ruth stood and collected her bag from the table.

"I'm going to go." she said quietly, watching as he put his credit card away.

"Fine. I'll call you this weekend."

She waited a moment to see if he would get up but he just glanced at her briefly before picking up his wine glass and finishing it. Her heard down, she made her way towards the coat check. As she waited for the girl to find her coat, she dug through her bag looking for her car keys. Finding them as her coat arrived, she quickly slid it on and made her way to the parking lot on the side of the building. Tonight had been an awful night and she couldn't wait to get home, curl up on the couch with Fidget and watch some mindless television. As she made her way down the row towards her car, she clicked the unlock button. Opening the door, she started to get in when something caught her eye. Sliding out from behind the door and shutting it, she made her way to the front tire and looked down. It was slashed. Turning quickly to the back tire, she found it slashed as well. Same as the tires on the other side of the car. Fighting back a sob, she leaned back against the closed door and rummaged through her purse trying to find her cell phone.

"Ruth?" she heard and jumped as Peter stopped next to her, his annoyance with her still evident in his voice. "What's wrong?"

"I've a flat." she said quietly, not wanting to make a huge scene. "I'm just going to call a taxi to come and get me."

"I'll take you home."

Looking up at him, she flinched at the look in his eye. "No, really, it's alright. I know it's out of your way. I'll call a taxi."

"I'm taking you home."

"Really Peter it's fine." she said again. Quickly locating the number for a Spook taxi in her phone, she pressed dial and lifted the phone to her ear. As the person on the other end picked up, she found the phone ripped from her hand and thrown to the ground. It shattered into four pieces. Pulling back, she shrunk against the car as Peter reached out and gripped her wrist tightly in his.

"I said I'm taking you home."

"Let me go."

He didn't answer, instead he turned and started walking towards his car, his grip on Ruth's wrist tightening.

"Peter let me go. You're _hurting_ me."

"Shut up."

"Hey Mate, the lady said let her go so let her go."

Ruth turned quickly at the voice and gasped in surprise. "Adam" she breathed "And Fiona." Watching as the two made their way towards them, she didn't stop to think about why they were in the parking lot or how they'd gotten there. She just felt immense relief at the sight of two people she trusted. Trying to pull her arm away from Peter, she cried out as he twisted it and pain shot up to her elbow. Before she could be dragged another step, Adam moved the last ten feet and stopped in front of the other man.

Putting his hand on his chest, he looked him in the eye. "Maybe you didn't hear me. Let her go now."

Ruth found herself free of the tight grip and cradled her arm tightly against her chest. Meeting Adam's eyes, she saw the pure anger swirling in their depths. "Ruth, please go over with Fiona. Now."

Not hesitating, she quickly made her way over to where the other Spook stood and turned back to watch the two men.

"This is none of your business _mate_." Peter said, taking a step towards Adam.

"Oh I think you'll find it is my business. One, I don't take lightly to men abusing woman and two, well, I care about Ruth. She's family. I _really_ don't take to someone hurting her. I suggest," he said, his voice dropping an octave, "that you get in your car and drive away. I don't think Ruth will be seeing you anymore."

"No one tells me who I can and can't see." turning towards Ruth, Peter watched her angrily. "Let's go Ruth. I'm taking you home."

"I'm not going anywhere with you Peter." as scared as she was, Ruth was proud of herself for not letting her voice shake. "And Adam's right, I don't want to see you again."

"Oh I think you'll be changing your mind Ruth."

With that, he pushed past Adam towards his car. Sliding into the driver's seat, he left the parking lot without a glance behind.

Adam slowly made his way over to where his wife and Ruth stood. Putting his hand on her shoulder, he gently pulled her into his arms and hugged her to him. Letting her go, he watched as the emotions of the night played across her face. Seeing the tears in her eyes, he quickly wiped them away.

"What happened?" he asked softly, his eyes meeting Fiona's who stood behind Ruth, a hand protectively lying on her shoulder where his had been a few minutes before. "And don't say nothing."

Ruth laughed slightly at how well he knew her. "We had a fight over dinner ... well actually two fights. He was angry that I was late and he was angry that..." she paused for a moment, the blush returning to her face "that we've not had sex yet. I told him I wasn't ready to take that step yet and he just went off. After we ate, I just left. He said he'd call me this weekend. When I got to my car - all the tires were slashed. You saw the rest."

"Ruth" Fiona said gently, her arm sliding around the shorter woman's shoulders. "Does he know where you live?"

Ruth nodded, fear gripping her. He'd picked her up a few times in the past two months for their dates. "Yes."

"Well, you're not staying there." Adam said, slowly walking towards their car. "Fiona and I will take you there to get some things that you'll need and the cats. You're coming to stay with us. We've a guest room you can use."

"I can't impose like that. I'll just find a hotel to stay at."

"No you won't. You're staying with us. It's not up for debate. We'd feel better knowing your safe and besides, Wes would love having his Aunt Ruth around."

At the mention of Wes, Ruth smiled. The little boy was such a sweetheart. "If you're sure it's not too much trouble." she said quietly, sliding into their back seat.

Adam looked in the rearview mirror as he started the car. "You're never too much trouble Ruth. I promise you that."

* * *

It was late as Harry finished reading the last file. His back ached, his head ached, and all he wanted at this point was to go home, have a glass or two of whiskey and crawl into his bed. Turning towards his computer to shut it down, he saw a message blinking on his desktop. Debating whether to leave it till morning or check it now, his sense of duty won out. Opening the icon, he saw a brief message.

"Mr. Pearce - a mutual friend of ours may need your help. You will find some files attached; may we suggest you read them sooner rather than later. - D"

Frowning, he opened the attached files and began to browse through them. Pictures filled the one; pictures of Ruth alone, with Peter, with members of the team, with himself. In the next one, he found a detailed report on this Peter Morgan; one much more through then the one vetting had put together. And finally, he found a folder filled with what looked like someone's journal or something. Skimming through them, he soon realized they weren't a journal but rather a bunch of seemingly different pieces written about a range of topics. As his eyes moved over one, he paused and re-read it. The color drained from his face as he realized Ruth had written them. Turning back to the first page, he read over the cover sheet. _In Your Head - A Collection of Short Pieces_ by Jamie Pearson. Leaning back in his chair, he turned to the first one - the tiredness he was feeling earlier gone.


	11. Can't Believe

_**AN: Thank you to the few who left me comments for the last chapter. I apologize to those who didn't like it and hope you'll let me know what was wrong so I can improve. =0)**_

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Book held in hand, Ruth took a deep breath and walked towards Harry's office. She'd come in late this morning; well later than she normally did; and so she'd missed him before he had left for his meeting with the Home Secretary. But she'd known he'd been there as the carefully wrapped package on her desk had attested to the fact. No one had paid her any mind as she'd opened the black and white iron scroll paper and gasped quietly at the book she found. A second edition printing of _Mansfield Park_ in almost mint condition. Opening the cover with a gentle hand, she traced her finger over the print and smiled; knowing only one person who could have given this to her. Turning the page, she found a cream colored envelope with her name written across the front. Lifting it, she pulled out a single card.

'_Ruth - many months ago I was searching for a gift for Catherine as she left on another journey to some far off country. As I was browsing the many offers the shop had to offer, I came across this little gem. Immediately I thought of you. I've been unsure of the how or when I was going to give this to you; especially with all that has transpired in the past few months; but I realized that now was the right moment. I know that you've nearly forgiven me for my deplorable actions but are not quite there. If I'm honest with myself, I am extremely lucky that you've forgiven me to this point. This isn't the place or the time for me to express my true feelings but I hope that one day; sooner rather than later; you can see it in your heart to forgive an old fool. Until then, I'll remain faithfully yours. ~Hx.'_

She'd been transfixed for a few minutes; unsure what was more shocking. The fact that she was holding a 189 year old book that she'd read many times as both a youth and an adult; or the fact that in a roundabout way, Harry had admitted to feeling something more towards her then boss to employee. It didn't matter though as one brought a feeling of happiness to her after the past 24 hours and the other brought a round of butterflies to her stomach. Both were quite enjoyable if she'd be honest with herself. But as Harry hadn't returned from his meeting, she had set the book carefully to the side and promised herself that as soon as he returned, she'd speak with him.

That had been an hour before. He'd been on his cell phone as he'd stepped through the pods, a look of utter disbelief on his face as he'd crossed the grid; speaking in low tones to whomever was on the other end. In the past hour they'd all heard some loud cursing and someone was a bloody git but Harry had yet to surface. It'd been ten minutes since the sound of a phone being slammed on a desk had reverberated around the grid and so Ruth had taken it as the moment to try and thank Harry for the wonderful gift. Hopefully his anger would have subsided some but he'd still be distracted enough that she could get in and get out without any kind of scene.

As she came around the corner of his door she continued through; not pausing to knock as had become her custom; and walked into Harry. Squeaking, she felt an arm go around her waist and hold her close as she tottered for a second, the arm holding the book trapped between their chests.

"Ruth?" He asked, quietly, watching as the color drained from her face.

She didn't hear his as she gasped from the pain shooting up her arm. Closing her eyes, she tried to hide the feeling but Harry was too quick for her. Pulling her into his office by walking backwards, he sat her in his chair and took the book from her hand. A smile graced his face as he saw what she was holding but he quickly set it on his desk as he glimpsed the angry bruise on her wrist. Sliding the sleeve of her shirt up, he slowly traced the purple and red marks. From the way their circled her wrist and arm, he could see they were from someone's hand and anger coursed through him. As his thumb brushed against the inside skin, he heard her suck her breath in again and he lifted his eyes to hers. Seeing the tears there, he slowly brushed them away before lying her hand gently in her lap. Standing, he crossed the room to a cabinet hidden in the wall. Opening it, he reached inside and pulled out an ice pack. Walking it back to where she sat, he laid it on her arm before sitting on the edge of his desk. He watched as she adjusted it before meeting his eyes.

"Thank you." she said softly.

"You're welcome. Are you alright?"

"Hmm. Yes. I'm sorry for just barging in." she said, trying to change the subject.

"It's alright. I've missed your barging in truthfully."

He watched as she blushed and looked back down at her lap, her hair falling forward and covering her face. Reaching forward, he gently tucked the front strands behind her ear and lifted her chin with his fingers. "Ruth what happened?" he asked quietly though after his reading the night before, he had a pretty good idea who and what had happened.

"Just a misunderstanding."

"That looks more like a misunderstanding."

"Oh no." she said, secretly loving the feeling of his fingers on her chin. "It was a misunderstanding on my part. Silly me thought no really meant no."

Anger coursed through him at the thought of more injuries that he couldn't see. "Where else are you hurt?"

She paused, confusion crossing her face before she realized how that sounded. "No, I'm fine." Meeting his raised eyebrow, she hurried on. "I promise. Adam turned up at just the right moment and acted as the white knight. He and Fiona even insisted I stay at their home for a few days until all this blows over."

Harry relaxed visibly at her words. "What is _this_ exactly?" Regrettably he left her chin go and placed his hands next to him on the desk.

"My finding out that our vetting process needs to be investigated."

Though he had read that disturbing report the night before, dread filled Harry. "Your boyfriend did this?"

"Ex-boyfriend and yes." Embarrassed at having this conversation with Harry, especially after what he had written in the book, she fought to change the subject. "Really, I'm fine. And I don't want to talk about it anymore. I was coming in to thank you for the book."

Harry let it drop for now though it did confirm his thoughts as to the identities of the mysterious Ds. He'd have to find a way to speak to them alone and thank them for stepping in when they did. And perhaps let them know that it was time to back off in their covert watching of their colleague. At her nervous look, he realized that he'd been silent a moment too long and he offered her a smile. "You don't have to thank me for it but you're welcome. I'm glad that you like it."

"I do." she said, meeting his smile. Seeing Adam walking towards the office, she reached for the book and stood. "I should go, Adam's coming to see you."

Harry stood too pulling down on his suit coat and watched as she turned to walk away. Pausing for a moment, she thought about what he had written in his note and about the concern he'd had since he had realized she was injured. Without thinking too much, she turned back towards him and leaned up to press her lips against the corner of his mouth. Blushing she stepped back and met his surprised eyes.

"I just need some time." she said softly, referencing the note that'd come with her book before turning again and making her way out the door.

His eyes followed her back to her desk and he waited until she was seated and back at work before turning towards Adam. Sitting behind his desk, he gestured at the door. "Close it and then tell me everything that's been going on."

* * *

_**Eggwhisker suggested the prompt "nearly, but not quite" and I thought it might work with starting to push Harry and Ruth along a better path.**_


	12. Here To Remind You

_**AN: Thank you everyone for your reviews! =) The prompt is hidden in the middle of this but it came from NatesDate again and was Lipstick Message.  
**_

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Harry silently watched Ruth as they were driven through the evening rush of London traffic, the brace on her left arm reflecting the orange street lamps as they passed under them. She'd been almost silent since she'd returned from seeing the on-duty doctor; just muttering that it was sprain and not broken. He hadn't meant to force her to see the doctor but after he'd seen the security footage, he'd insisted much like an overbearing man. There was something about seeing her grabbed like that and pulled along against her will that had him seeing red but more so, the look on her face when that bastard had twisted her arm in his had him wanting to meeting the man in a dark alley one evening. Of course, now that everything was out in the open, she'd gotten extremely quiet and had barely spoken a word to anyone on the grid.

"I'm not angry at you."

"What?" he asked, pulled from his thoughts at her quiet voice.

"You're thinking very loudly over there. I'm not angry at you."

"I didn't think you were." he said softly, lifting his eyes to her face.

She turned from the window and looked at him in the darkened car. "I'm angry at the situation, frustrated that the people I work with thought it necessary that they had to follow me; that I was too naive to deal with anything outside of information; and ... embarrassed isn't the word but I can't think of one tonight ... about the whole Peter issue."

"Ruth, they didn't do it because they thought you were naive."

"No, then why were they _following_ me for the last three months?"

Reaching across the seat, he gently lifted her braced hand and held it in his. "Ruth, listen to me, they weren't following you for any other reason than the fact that they care about you. You heard what Malcolm and Colin said when they told you how all this started."

Ruth looked down at the hand that was every so softly lying atop hers, fingers entwined and slowly rubbing against her palm offering nothing more than comfort. Twelve hours before and she probably would have ripped her hand from his; it was amazing what having ones world turned upside down could do to someone. "I...I know they care but why didn't they come to me?"

With a sigh, he leaned back against the seat, his shoulders sagging before continuing. "Not to be crass but were you listening at all when they were explaining?"

She tensed at his words, intent on pulling her hand from his when the true meaning behind his words penetrated her wounded pride. Following his example, she sagged against the seat and felt the fight leave her. "Honestly? Not really. I was too angry." she admitted, albeit quietly.

Harry turned his head and looked at her. He could see that all the events and information she'd been forced to process over the last 24 hours was pushing her into information overload. Pressing his luck, he let his grip on her hand go and slid across the seat. Sliding his arm around her shoulders, he pulled her against his side. For a moment she tensed again but he quickly felt the tension slide from her body and she sagged against him, her head coming to rest against his chest as she sought the comfort she so desperately needed. They stayed like that for a few minutes in silence before he continued.

"Colin saw you in that Internet Cafe three months ago when he and Malcolm were testing the strength of the new security measures they had implemented on the firewall for the Grid. You were so engrossed in what you were doing that you didn't notice him sitting behind you. He'd started to call your name when he noticed a man watching you from the corner. Again nothing too strange since you are a beautiful woman but the way he was watching you worried him." he paused, waiting to see if she noticed what he said but she just continued to breathe softly against him. "When you left, he watched for a moment and found that the man followed you out the door. He followed too to make sure nothing happened and though it didn't, he was worried enough that he told Malcolm about what happened. For the next two weeks, the two of them kept an eye on you just to make sure nothing sinister happened. They were worried about that guy and nothing else. I promise. If he went away, they would have stopped but he didn't go away. Then ... the incident happened and he approached you. They were worried enough that they went to Adam about what was happening and the three of them plus Fiona and Danny started not only following you when you went out with him but also started investigating him."

"That's how Adam and Fiona happened to be there last night."

"Yes. They've been sneaking glances at your diary and saw that you were meeting him there. They pulled some strings, made it look like they were meeting an asset in case you happened to notice, and followed you there." He paused a moment, tightening his grip on her shoulders.

"I wondered how they happened to be there."

"I didn't know they were doing it and honestly, I'm glad I didn't. Because if I had, I would have forced them to stop and then Adam wouldn't have been there last night to step in."

"When did you find out?"

"Last night. Adam decided that I needed to be made aware of what was going on after the scene in the restaurant. Either I've been forgiven for my indiscretions or they decided that I was the lesser of two evils. Whichever the case, I received a coded message with some pictures, a bunch of documents and briefings and some other things." He refrained from telling her he'd received the pieces she'd been writing on that site; now was not the time to let on that he knew her feelings on a lot of what had happened. Or that he'd also found out last night that she had taken Wes to the museum when he'd thought she'd gone with Peter. He was stopped from answering as they pulled up in front of her house. Reluctantly he let go of his hold of her and let her slide towards the door. Reaching across her, he opened the door handle as Mike slid from the driver seat. As she climbed out of the car, he made to follow.

"Harry, I'm just going to get my post and a few things I forgot. You don't have to come in. I'll be a few minutes."

"Nonsense." he said, climbing from the car. "Even if there wasn't the possibility that Peter could be lurking around here, you're down to one good arm and I'm not going to let you carry anything."

Placing his hand on the small of her back, he led her up the walk as Mike stayed by the car watching. As they neared the door, Ruth pulled out her keys and found the one to undo the lock. Sliding it in, she twisted it and pushed the door open. Stepping into the darken hall, she flipped on a light switch and paused. Her house was a mess. Items dumped off tables, books torn and pictures ripped in half. Harry grabbed her and pulled her back against him as she made to move further into the house.

"Mike." he called out, bundling Ruth onto the front step as they waited for the driver/security man to reach them. "Someone's been in the house." he said quietly, motioning towards the hall.

As the man nodded and stepped slowly into the house, Harry turned Ruth towards him and met her eyes. "Ruth, I want you to go get in the car and lock the doors until either Mike or I come and get you."

Pulling her coat tighter around herself, she shook her head. "No. He could be out here waiting until I'm alone to try and grab me. I'm not going to sit here trussed up like a Christmas Goose waiting for him. I...I feel safer staying with you."

Harry conceded and motioned her behind him. "Alright but if I tell you to get out, you do so. No questioning me and no hesitating."

Nodding, she stepped behind him as they moved into her front foyer. They could hear Mike moving through the downstairs, checking cabinets and closets for any sign of another person. Harry moved towards the steps slowly and Ruth reached out to grab the back of his jacket. He stopped for a moment and looked back at her. She shook her head and pressed closer as he made his way up the steps. Stopping at the top, he took in the four closed doors and one open. Turning back to Ruth, he silently gestured towards the doors.

Stepping up and leaning towards his ear, she whispered softly. "First door to the left is the guest room, next is the box room, office, bathroom and the open door is my bedroom."

Nodding, he stepped towards the first door and pushed it open. Finding nothing out of the ordinary and nowhere that anyone could be hiding, he moved to the next door. Turning the handle, he opened it and stepped into the room; Ruth still pressed into his back. Moving slowly around the boxes and items in the room, he checked all spaces that someone could be before stepping back into the hall. Meeting Mike in the hall, the three moved towards the office. Mike opened the door and looked around, shaking his head before moving towards the bathroom. Checking inside, he quickly stepped back and turned towards the last door. The three moved into her bedroom and stopped. The destruction of downstairs continued up here and Ruth gasped softly, her hand going to her mouth as she took in the destroyed books and her duvet. Stepping from behind Harry, she slowly moved towards her bed and took in the destruction. The multi-hue plum duvet was shredded, the delicate ivory vines and leaves engrossed in the material ripped beyond repair. As her eyes traveled further up the bed, she found the thick cashmere throw charred with a picture of herself burnt around the edges. In a red lipstick she recognized from her bathroom, the word 'Mine' was written diagonal across her face. Shuddering, she moved to the bedside table and slid open the drawer. Reaching inside, she pulled out a small photo album and opened it. Seeing the photos of her father unharmed, she let out a small sigh and hugged it to her chest. Turning back to Harry and Mike, she crossed the room and stood in front of them.

"You don't need to be here tonight." Harry said softly, reaching out and taking the album from her. Stepping back, he let her move out the door and the two men followed her downstairs. As they reached the hall, she stepped over the broken items and into her sitting room. Seeing more of her things ripped off shelves and tossed to the floor, a sadness filtered through her. She felt exposed and violated at the thought that someone had been pawing through her things. Spying an elegantly wrapped box sitting on her coffee table, she slowly moved towards it. As she reached to untie the yellow ribbon, Harry's hand reached out and grabbed hers, stopping her from pulling the thing fabric. Turning to look at him, she watched as he shook his head. Still holding her hand, he pulled her back as Mike moved to the box and looked at it. Not seeing anything out of the ordinary, he untied the ribbon and slowly pulled the lid off. The three looked down into the box and Ruth gasped, turning her head into Harry's shoulder. Lying his hand against her hair, he held her head in place as he looked at the two turtle doves; their necks snapped as they laid entwined together. Taking the card that Mike handed him, he read it slowly.

_Oh yonder doth sit that little turtle dove_

_It doth sit on yonder high tree_

_A making a moan for the loss of his love _

_As I will do for thee, my dear_

_As I will do for thee (Drisdelle)_

Handing it to the other man, Harry slowly turned Ruth and led her into the hall. Stopping by the stairs, he held her to him as Mike followed.

"Get a team out here to go through the house." he said softly, looking around. "Have them pack up anything that isn't beyond repair and have them take it with you."

"No." Ruth interjected, looking up at the two. "This is my home; I'm not having my things put in some safe house for anyone to paw through."

Momentarily ignoring her, he continued on. "Have them take everything to my house. Everything will be safe there for now." As Mike stepped out of the house to make the call, Harry turned to Ruth. "I'm not going to argue with you Ruth. It's obvious it's not safe here and I'm not going to allow any more of your things to be destroyed." A thought suddenly occurred to him and he looked around. "Where are your cats?"

"At Adam and Fiona's." She said softly, meeting his eyes. "Hopefully they won't mind keeping them a bit longer."

He noticed the change in her voice and watched her, knowing what she was thinking. "You're not staying in a hotel."

"I can't stay with them. They have Wes; I couldn't put him let alone them at risk. It'll be better if I find a hotel and stay there."

"No." he tried to keep the growl out of his voice but the thought of her alone somewhere trying to stay away from the mentally disturbed man caused a fear to course through him. "You are not staying somewhere alone."

"I can't stay here and I can't stay with them." she said, her voice rising. "And I'm not staying in a cold safe house."

Reaching out for her hand, he held it between his. "You're not staying here and you're not going to a safe house. You're coming home with me." Seeing the shock and hesitation on her face, he continued. "To my guest room."

"Harry."

Sliding his thumb against her palm, he shushed her. "Ruth, you said it yourself. You don't want to put Wes or Adam and Fiona in danger and I'm not letting you stay in a hotel or a safe house. I've got an entire house that has plenty of space and I'd feel better knowing I could keep an eye on you. It's purely selfish on my part but I'm going to worry unless you're under the same roof. So unless you'd rather go back to the grid and sleep in the briefing room, we're going to my house."

Nodding softly, she met his eyes. "Alright."

* * *

_**Okay - so question for you. Is Harry's house the one in Series 2 when the briefcase gets stolen or the one in Series 4 when he's been suspended?**_


	13. Fallin' For You

_**AN: Thank you all for the reviews and the feedback. I realized when I wrote the earlier chapters, I was thinking of a combination of the two houses. So I'm guessing the house he's living in now is a combination of the two houses since he's got a front garden and steps leading up to the house.**_

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Two weeks she'd been living in his house; sleeping down the hall from him, showering next door to his bedroom, eating breakfast in his kitchen. Two weeks and he knew without a doubt he was in trouble. Every day, he found something else that made him fall in love with her and the thought of her leaving when this whole thing was over was literally breaking his heart. It'd been so long since he'd truly lived with anyone else that he'd forgotten the comfort of just having someone else there. Even if they went their separate ways after dinner, she was in the house. And he was learning something new about her every day.

Like she loved to cook. It wasn't the clean, organized cooking you caught on TV or even what he did when he set out to make a meal for himself. No, Ruth was organized chaos when it came to cooking; a whirlwind in the kitchen that left everything in disarray. Pots and pans everywhere, a speck of whatever on the counter and about a dozen more on the floor and ingredients managing to intermingle without actually contaminating the others. But it was her face that he loved the most. The deep concentration as she carefully but quickly cut up whatever was needed, her laissez faire attitude to what she was doing making him smile. His favorite face though was the uncensored joy when he commented on how much en enjoyed the meal they were having. It'd been a long time since her eyes had lit up towards him like they did and the smile on her face was almost too much to handle. And that made the mess worth it; even when she was exploding pots of chili all over the place.

He wasn't daft enough to admit that everything was great. She wasn't a morning person; was far from it; and had bitten his head off more times than he could count in the last two weeks. There was also the nasty habit of hers for kicking off her shoes as soon as she was in the door, leaving them for him to trip over. And there had been more times then he cared to remember that his bath towel had gotten soaked from the wet flannel she had tossed over it to try, traces of whatever white cream she had smeared over her face...or wherever she smeared it. But in the course of things, they were minor; things he could get over if only he could keep her.

As the car turned onto his street, he glanced over at her prone figure. She'd fallen asleep almost as soon as they'd pulled out of Thames House; the past 72 hours finally catching up to her. He knew how she felt, he was beyond exhausted himself but the chance to watch her sleep unabashed was one too lucrative to pass up. Her head lolled back against the seat, face turned towards him, the lines of stress fully erased and the sound of soft little mews as she breathed in and out were things he filed away in his mind. She was calm and still in sleep; something he hadn't been expecting and all he wanted to do was slide across the seat, wrap himself around her, and tell the rest of the world to get buggered. But he doesn't. They were finally back on even ground and he'd be damned if he was going to screw it up now. As the car pulled into his drive, he sighed softly. It'd been so long since she last slept that he didn't want to wake her up but he also didn't know if he'd be able to carry her to the front door, let alone into the house. Reaching a hand out to her shoulder, he was about to shake her awake when Mike spoke.

"Don't wake her."

Looking up at his driver, he shook his head. "I can't carry her i..."

"I know, you need to unlock the door and get the alarm but I can carry her into the living room for you and you can go from there. I'd do the alarm for you but I know you and your security codes; Ruth's the only one you trust with it." he said, giving his boss a way out without making him feel too bad about not carrying the sleeping woman.

Harry paused a moment and weighed the pros and cons. He really didn't want to wake her but he also didn't like the idea of another man carrying her as she slept...or period. Mike made his decision for him though with his next comment.

"She shouldn't even wake up. I've gotten very good at moving Molly from my wife's side when I get home at night without waking her. Just get the door and the alarm and I'll get Ms. Evershed."

"Ruth." Harry said quietly, sliding over to his door. "She'll throw a fit if she hears you calling her Ms. Evershed again."

Laughing quietly, Mike climbed out of the car as well. As Harry crossed the drive and walked up the path, Mike pulled open the door and slowly undid the belt. Gently sliding his arms under her knees, he picked her up and cradled her to him. Leaving the doors as they were, he crossed to the door and walked into Harry's house. Following his boss down the hall, he entered the sitting room and carefully laid Ruth on the gray sofa. Stepping back, the two watched as she sighed softly and curled into the throw pillow. Moving into the hall, Harry thanked the other man and said goodnight. Closing the door, he locked it and re-set the alarm before turning off the light. Shrugging out of both his over coat and suit coat, he tossed them on the banister and then in a totally Ruth move, kicked his shoes off under the table. Trying not to think about that too much, he shook his head and turned back towards the hall.

Making his way back to the sitting room, he moved towards Ruth and debated what to do. He should let her sleep but she'd be very uncomfortable in her boots and coat; but would she think him presumptuous if he removed them? Shaking his head, he slowly moved to her feet and worked the boots off before looking at her coat. Trying to find the easiest way to do it, he slowly worked a sleeve down. Just as he's finally managed to get it over her fingers, he feels her shift and groan softly. Cursing under his breath, he looks up and meets her eyes.

"Harry?" she asked, sleep filling her voice.

"I'm sorry, just trying to get you undressed." he paused, realizing how that had to have sounded and cleared his throat. "I mean just trying to get your coat off so you'll be more comfortable."

"Mmkay." she muttered, sleepily pushing herself into a sitting position.

Taking the opportunity to get her coat the rest of the way off, Harry quickly pulls the other sleeve down and tosses the garment onto the oversized chair. Looking back at her, he watched as she rubbed her hands over her eyes and looked up at him through lowered eyelids.

"I'll just...let you go back to sleep." he said softly, taking a step back, his eyes down to the floor.

"Harry?"

"Hmm?" He asked, stopping to look at her.

"Don't go." she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

"I'm not leaving. Just going upstairs to bed."

"Oh."

"What's wrong?" he asked, moving towards her.

Slowly she lifted her head and met his eyes, the sleepiness still there but he could also see more coherent thought processes moving behind it. "I...just...would you stay with me?" she finally bursts out, her cheeks flaring a bright red.

Without answering, Harry took a tentative step towards the couch, his nails digging into the palm of his hands to keep from shaking. Such a small request but one that filled him with hope. She wanted him to stay. Baby steps in a good direction. He watched as she slid down the couch, making room for him where her head had been. Reaching for the pillow, he pulled it into his arms and lowered himself carefully onto the cushion. Holding himself still, he waited and felt his heart drop as she suddenly stood.

"Lay down." she said quietly, standing next to the couch.

"What?" he asked, clearly having misheard her request.

"You're not comfortable, lay down."

Shaking his head slightly at the pure strangeness of her request, he stood next to her and placed the throw pillow back on the cushion. Sliding onto the couch, he stretched out, his back settling against the back as he slid an arm under the pillow. Wondering where this was going, he watched as Ruth grabbed the pillow from the other end and laid it next to his. Before he had time to think, she had sat on the couch and stretched out next to him, her back lightly pressing against his chest. Shocked, Harry didn't move, didn't breathe as she moved until she found a more comfortable position.

"Is this alright?" she asked softly, her body tense.

"Errr...yes."

Her body relaxing visibly, Ruth slid her hand under the pillows and let her fingers rest against his as she fell further against him. Unsure which deity to thank, Harry closed his fingers around hers and reached behind him with his other hand. Pulling the cream throw from behind the cushions, he tossed it over them, wrapping them up against the cold December air. As he drifted into sleep; her body nestled against his, her stocking feet tangled with his sock covered ones, his free arm draped loosely over her waist and their fingers entwined; he realized that he wasn't going to be able to let her go. No matter what it took; cutting off a limb, killing Juliet, leaving the service, baring his soul; he knew that he couldn't stand to let her leave his life...and his house.

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_**This went a bit fluffy and there there's no mention of Peter. He'll be back next chapter with yet more dastardly deeds. My brain couldn't wrap itself around anything but lighthearted fluff tonight. That's the work of cough medicine addling my mind; stupid Philly allergy season just had to come back. Reviews are lovely...they make my world go round.**_


	14. Run

_Everyone thinks that I only enjoy the classics; classic books, classical music, classic food; but there is so much more in life than those. I know that. My entire life is not based on the classics. I just choose not to share much of myself with other people. It's not that I don't want to because I do. I yearn for a close relationship or two. But the one person I was close too died. Not by his choosing obviously but still he died. It took me many years to come to terms with that and as I did, I realized that those of us left behind really didn't matter much to the other. Don't get me wrong, I love my mother. She gave birth to me, nursed me when I was ill, made sure I had everything I could possibly need and more but she also tried to make me into her idea of the perfect little girl. Ballet lessons, piano lessons, etiquette lessons, waltz lessons; any lesson you can think of, she pushed it on me. My father was different; he let me be me. Taught me to play chess, how to ride my first bike, what the difference between classic Roman literature and classic Greek literature was, and before he died when I was eleven, he taught me the proper way of making sure a boy never does anything I don't want him too...knee first. Of course, I seemed to have forgotten that lesson lately._

_But I regress. My life is not only about classics. We all have a guilty pleasure or two. Things we don't necessarily talk about with other people in our lives. Maybe eventually we share that pleasure with the person we fall in love with but for the most part, it stays private. And I; like other people; have a guilty pleasure or two. There's the small ones; like coming home after a long day at work, kicking off my shoes and just walking around barefoot. Small thing I know but when a long day at work could mean four days for me, kicking off my shoes and walking barefoot is a bit thing. Or climbing out of bed at 11 at night, wandering down to the kitchen in my pajamas and eating pistachio gelato from the container because the urge overcomes me. It's not like I have to worry about sharing it with anyone!_

_I think my biggest guilty pleasure though is food. Not just eating it mind you, but making it as well. There's something to be said about sitting down with a cook book and pouring over the pages looking for that one recipe that jumps out at you to try. Will it be something adventurous or an old classic that warms you from the inside? Then there's the getting the ingredients. Going to the market and picking out the fresh vegetables; the peppers, the onions, the tomatoes and whatever else you need; standing at the meat counter and finding the perfect piece of meat, slipping down the dairy isle for some cheese or milk or cream. And the people in the market. You know there are always some interesting people there. The man feeling up the melons, the woman dipping her finger into the salads, the older lady pinching the bums of the shelving men._

_But the real fun begins when you get home and slip into something more comfortable than your shopping clothes. For me, it's a pair of loose black jogging bottoms, an old gray t-shirt from Oxford, and warm, comfy white socks. Everyone is different though so whatever. Then it's back to the kitchen to slip in a CD; something relaxing without any surprising moments as I wouldn't want to lose a finger. As the music starts to fill the air, I can get all my things together or as the American Chef Anne Burrell my Mise en place. Pots, pans, knifes, cutting boards, measuring cups, bowls, spoons and anything else I can think of plus all my ingredients. Once I have everything together the real prep begins. The washing and peeling of vegetables, the slicing and dicing that follows. Browning the meat, mixing together spices, slowly stirring something as it simmers on the stove; heating up slowly to bring out the intense flavors that just explode in your mouth._

Ruth paused; pen over paper as she heard the slight cough from the door. Glancing up, she blushed as she saw Harry leaning against his kitchen door frame.

"You okay there Ruth?" he asked, moving slowly into the room.

"Yyyees. Why wouldn't I be?

"Well, you had this weird look on your face as you bent over that paper."

"Look?" she asked, sliding her hands up and over the paper.

"Hmm." Standing behind her, he leaned over her shoulder and tried to read her writing. "One that looked like a mix between pure...bliss and something else."

Blushing, she quickly folded the paper before looking up at him. "It's nothing. Just jotting down some ideas."

Stepping to the counter, he picked up a glass and filled it with water. Turning, he leaned back against the counter and watched her. "For what?"

"Nothing important." Pushing the chair back, she stood. "I do think I'm going to pop over to that Internet Cafe on the next street though. Things to do."

Frowning, Harry took a sip of the water and watched her. "Why? You have a laptop in the other room that's connected to my wireless. And if there's a problem with that, there's always mine. You know you can use it without asking."

"I know. Just...don't want to use our laptops, that's all." Sliding the chair in, she moved to leave the kitchen.

"Please tell me you're not doing something that could constitute treason?"

Whipping around, she looked at him. "What?"

Pushing from the counter, he moved towards here. "Well, what am I supposed to think. You're sitting here writing something on a piece of paper that you folded and twisted into tiny pieces to ensure I can't get near it. Now you're slipping off to an Internet Cafe to do some odd thing when we both have perfectly good laptops sitting in this house with a perfectly good Internet connection _and_ it's started to sleet outside."

Looking over his shoulder to the window, she saw he was correct. Sighing, she met his eyes again, knowing he'd keep pushing until she told him or start snooping if she didn't. Walking back to the table, she pulled out a chair and sat down; waiting as he did the same.

"I've been...writing."

"Writing?" he asked, trying to keep his face neutral; not wanting to let on that he knew.

"Yes, writing." With a sigh, she looked up at him, and continued. "A few months ago, a friend from Uni suggested I join a writing site. She's been pestering me for years to write something to be published but I've not wanted too. It seemed like too much of an invasion into my thoughts and life plus doing what we do, it could be dangerous. Addison; my friend; suggested creating a pseudo personality to do some writing on this one site. She's in publishing and it's something that they apparently do all the time. I thought she was crazy at first but when I started thinking about it...well, it sounded like fun. So I did it. Sat down one weekend, created an entire legend for the website and started writing. That's why I've been visiting Internet Cafes the past few months; I didn't want anyone to know." Blushing, she looked down at her hands, waiting for ... what she didn't know.

Harry smiled, pleased that she had shared this with him. Reaching across the table, he lightly laid his hand against hers. "May I read what you've written?"

Blushing harder, she lifted her face and met his eyes. "No!"

Smile faltering a little, Harry nodded. "Of course. I'm sorry for asking."

Sensing his disappointment, she put her other hand over his. "It's not that I...it's...I mean it's _personal_ and I'm not ready for anyone else to know. I never _planned_ on anyone I know knowing about it."

"Ruth it's alright really. I shouldn't have asked." Squeezing her hand, he let go and stood. "I should probably take Scarlett out for a walk before it gets too bad out there."

As he moved towards the door, she stood and turned to him, a feeling she couldn't describe settling over her heart. "Harry." she called softly.

He paused and turned back. "Yes Ruth?"

"Maybe one day."

"Of course."

Feeling guilty as he made his way down the hall, she sighed and sat back in the chair. Something had changed with them over the past few weeks. She couldn't describe it but it had. Even with everything going on and the mess she'd made of her relationship with Peter, something had changed. And while it scared her to think about, it was a good change. As she sat there contemplating, her cell phone rang. Reaching for it, she absentmindedly flipped it open.

"Hello?"

"Hello Ruth."

Tensing, she sat up. "Peter?" she asked hesitantly, all thoughts of harry and their changing relationship slipping from her mind.

"Miss me darling?"

"Wh..what do you want?"

"To talk. You've been avoiding me; not answering my calls, never home when I stop by and you've not been to the Internet Cafe in weeks. I'm disappointed in you."

"I told you, it's over."

"Oh no Ruth. It's not over until I tell you it's over."

"I'm sorry Peter but I can't do this anymore. Please don't call me again."

Hanging up the phone, she set it on the table and tried to calm her shaking hands. As it rang again, she stared at it willing it with all her might to stop. It did for a moment before it started to ring again. And she ignored it again. After the fifth time the phone rang and stopped; rang and stopped, Ruth finally picked it up.

"Hh..hello?"

"That wasn't very nice of you Ruth."

"Please leave me alone."

"No!" a chill went down her spine as she heard the anger in his voice. "I will not leave you alone. You do not tell me what to do. You are not in charge of this relationship - I am. Now, I let you have your little fantasy about how fast it was going to move but that's over. You will be at my house. Tonight. 7 PM."

Hearing the door shut in the distance, she shook slightly, the phone clutched in her hand. "No Peter. I told you, we're done."

"You're not understanding me Ruth. I tell you what's going to happen, I tell you how things are going to be. And you do what I say. Now firstly, you are going to leave that old man's house. I don't appreciate you staying there these past few weeks. Completely inappropriate."

"What are you talking about?"

"Really Ruth, don't lie to me. You're sitting in his kitchen right now wearing a hideously baggy green jumper with your hair a fright. And I know you're all alone in that big house. He's out walking that mangy mutt of his. I made sure of that before calling."

Gasping, she looked up and out the window into the back yard. Not seeing anything, she stood and slowly crossed to the glass. Hearing his chuckle through the phone, she strained her neck trying to see where he was.

"Oh my poor darling. Do you miss me so much you need a glimpse of me?"

"Ruth? What's wrong?"

Turning at Harry's voice, she saw him in the doorway concern on his face as he brushed the moisture from his hair. Ignoring the person on the phone, she flung herself across the kitchen and into his arms, crying out his name. "Harry!"

Harry stood shocked, the feeling of her pressing herself to his chest. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around her, holding her close. Leaning down, he pressed his lips against her ear. "Ruth, what is it?"

Still wrapped in his arms, she mumbled into his chest. "I...it's...Peter."

Pulling back slightly, Harry kept his arms around her. "What do you mean it's Peter?"

Meeting his eyes, she slowly held up her phone.

Frowning, Harry lifted a hand and took the device from her. Lifting it to his ear, he listened.

"Harry is it?"

Gripping the phone in his hand, Harry growled at the voice on the other end. "Peter I would assume."

"Shut up old man and listen. I don't know who you are or what you want but she's mine. You're going to let her go and you're going to step away. Then she's going to walk out her door and come back to me."

Harry held Ruth tighter as he glanced at the back door. Satisfied to see the double locks in place, he slowly started walking them down the hall, his grip on Ruth not loosening. As he neared the front door, he checked that the locks were in place before reaching for the alarm. Quickly ensuring that it was set, he turned his attention back to the phone.

"Ruth will not be going anywhere near you; not now and not in the future. I suggest," he said, his voice going deathly quiet, "that you forget about Ruth and move on. Otherwise I _will_ make your life unbelievably painful - and short."

Snapping the phone closed, he wrapped both arms around Ruth and held her to him. Leaning down, he lightly pressed his lips against her hair. "It'll be alright, I promise."

He felt her tense a moment then nod. Hugging her tightly for a moment, he reluctantly let her go. Taking her hand, he waited until she met his eyes and led her into the living room. Sitting her onto the sofa they'd fallen asleep on the night before, he pushed her into the cushion. Grabbing the throw from where it had landed on the floor, he wrapped it around her shoulders. Running his hand down the side of her face, he watched as she met his eyes and tried to smile. He smiled back, his fingers lingering for a moment before he turned and made his way to the window. Glancing outside, he took in every one that was moving along the street. Pulling the curtains closed, he opened Ruth's phone and dialed a number. As the man on the other end picked up, he looked back at Ruth.

"Adam, we have a problem."

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_**I'm not too sure about this chapter. It sounded right in my head but on paper... Thank you all for the lovely reviews. I'm glad to see people are enjoying this. Please let me know what you think. =0)**_

_**The prompt was "write about a guilty pleasure"**_


	15. I'm Falling In Love With You

_**AN: Thank you all for the lovely reviews. I'm glad you liked the last chapter. Hope this one is to your liking as well.**_

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"What do you think you're doing?" Harry asked, standing in the doorway of the guest room.

Ruth turned from the dresser, a pile of clothes in her hands. "Packing." Walking the short distance, she pushed them into the open suitcase on the guest bed and turned back to the dresser, grabbing another stack of clothes.

Crossing the distance of the room, he took the pile of clothes from her hands and threw them back in the dresser. Grabbing her shoulders, he stopped her movement and starred into her eyes. "Why the hell are you packing?"

"So I can leave." she said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Sliding her hands up to his, she tried to pry them off her shoulders. "But you've got to let me go so I can finish."

"Like hell. You're not leaving this house Ruth; not tonight and not ever if I had my say." Anger mixed with a side of fear coursed through him. "Even if I have to lock you in this damned bedroom."

Breath coming out harsh, he continued watching her as he held tight to her shoulders. There was no way he was letting her leave his side. Not with a crazy man lurking somewhere outside his house. And even if there wasn't, he didn't know if he'd be willing to let her go. No, he wasn't letting her out of his sight; there was no way he could keep her safe if she was anywhere but in front of him, next to him; with him.

In the back of her mind, she heard what he was saying and a part of her did a happy little dance. But the foremost thought present was get away from Harry. Keep him safe. Protect him from whatever was coming. She wasn't naive enough to think that Peter was going to stop at just calling her from outside Harry's house. If she stayed here, she was putting Harry at risk. That wouldn't do. Not at all.

"Really Harry. I can't finish packing if you don't let go of my shoulders."

"I ask again, what do you think you're doing? Packing for what? Planning on moving into Scarlett's basket with her? Because that's in my bedroom and most nights she doesn't sleep in it; she much prefers sharing my bed. Which you're more than welcome to. Share with her I mean. I'll sleep in her basket. Or on the damned floor." Stepping closer, he slid his hands down her arms. "And you've no reason to pack a suitcase for that. I'll happily be your pack mule and carry everything to a wardrobe in there."

"But don't you see, I have to leave. I can't stay here." She paused as she felt his hands slide down her wrists, his fingers sliding through hers and tightly gripping them. Train of thought momentarily chased from her head, she looked into his eyes; for the first time seeing something more, something warm and...shaking her head, she tried to step back, the reason for her mission even more clear than it was before. "I need to go somewhere far, far away." Managing to get her hands free, she reached for the clothes again. "If I'm away than Peter has no reason to harm the person I'm in love with. He'll have to follow me; well try to follow me. I won't make it easy for him. I've learned a few tricks from working with you and Adam and Danny and even Fiona. But his attention will be focused on me and you'll be safe."

Harry stared at her, his mouth open, his heart beating a thousand times faster. Had she just said what he thought she said? Did she just admit to being in love with him? In love with the colossal screw up? And in the middle of a rant about why she had to leave? Leave? She wasn't leaving. Snapping out of his thoughts, he watched as she zipped the suitcase closed and picked up the handle. Stepping next to her, he grabbed the suitcase from her hand, moving it to his left. Grabbing her right hand, he turned towards the door and half drug her behind him into the hall. Turning to the right, he moved into his bedroom.

"You're right, you can't stay there."

Ruth didn't have a chance to answer as he sat her on the side of his bed, setting the suitcase on the floor by her feet. Turning towards his wardrobe, he rummaged through the bottom, pulling something out of a drawer.

"Harry, what are you doing?" she asked, clearly confused as to what he could possibly need at a moment like this.

"Just looking for something you'll need, that's all." Smiling to himself, he slid his fingers over the objects and nodded. They would do nicely. "Taped to the back of the headboard is an envelope of money. Could to reach behind and get it? You'll need it." Keeping his back to her, he slowly worked with what he was holding.

"Ookkay." she said, wondering just how he'd come to change his mind about her leaving so quickly. Then what she had said earlier filtered through her mind. She'd told him she was in love with him. Oh God. And now he couldn't get rid of her fast enough. Lead filled her stomach as she realized she'd clearly been wrong about all the small gestures over the past few months; his indiscretion with Juliet not really a mistake at all. Fighting back tears, she shakily stood and kneeled on the mattress, careful not to squish his pillow. Straining to reach over the slotted headboard, she didn't hear him move swiftly across the room.

Before she could fathom what he was doing, he slid the purple and black tie around her wrist, sliding the knotted loop tight before knotting the other end around the headboard. Grabbing her other hand, he slid the blue with white dots tie around it, gently pushing her around until she was sitting with her back against the headboard. Knotting the tie through the other side of the headboard, he moved off the bed and looked at her, his eyes going soft at the tears he saw. Reaching forward, he carefully brushed them away.

"Oh Ruth, I'm sorry. Really I am. But I can't let you leave. Not when there is a man somewhere out there wanting to hurt you. You mean too much to me." Turning, he looked around the room, trying to find the remote for the TV. Spotting it at the foot of the bed, he reached for it and flipped on the TV, turning on some mindless dribble. Setting the remote on the nightstand, he met Ruth's eyes. "Someday I hope you'll forgive me for this. I don't want to hurt you or scare you but I can't have you trying to sneak off when my back is turned. This way I'll know you're safe. Please make yourself comfortable. I'm going to go wait for Adam, Fiona and the other's to arrive. I'll be back to check on you later."

He turned to leave but paused, a thought going through his head. Spinning around to face her again, he leaned forward before he could lose his nerve. "And Ruth, I love you too." With that, he pressed his mouth against hers, his lips slowly moving over hers in the gentlest and softest of kisses. All too soon, he pulled away. And pressed his lips against the tip of her nose, in the middle of her forehead, and against her wavy hair. Standing, he ran his fingers down the side of her face, eyes meeting eyes as she looks up at him. "I know now is not the time nor the place for this discussion or for anything else. But I needed you to know," feeling more liberated now that he's said it, "I love you too. And once all this is over and you've had some time to process everything and to move on, then we'll sit down to discuss this. _Us_. But not before you're ready. I'll wait as long as you need."

Brushing his thumb against her cheek, he smiled at her as the doorbell rang. Dropping his hand, he turned and walked out of the room, throwing a glance back at her before going to let the Calvary in.

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_**AN: This came to me as I was folding my wash earlier and wouldn't leave me. I just had to come and write it because...Ruth and Harry have the worst timing possible. Really they do. And why should telling the other how they really feel be any different? There wasn't a prompt for this unless a loveseat full of clean clothes and an empty dresser counts as a prompt.**_


	16. Daydream

_**AN: Thank you all for the reviews on the last chapter. I didn't actually plan on Harry tying Ruth up - it just happened.**_

_**This chapter came about because of HR always live on's comment of imaging Harry tying Ruth up being a little bit more erotic as well as the very naughty clouds in the sky this afternoon. I needed a little...tense fluff before moving onto the next chapter. So thank you HR for your impromptu prompt. =0) **_

_**Reviews are lovely and they do make me write a bit faster.**_

_**Warning...some may find this slightly M rated.**_

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It'd been over an hour since Harry had left her tied to the bed. An hour in which she had plenty of time to think, to analyze, to contemplate. For the first ten minutes, she had debated yelling for someone to come and help her. She knew from the muted voices downstairs that everything had arrived and had she shouted just once; Adam and Danny in the least would have come running. And she had almost yelled. She'd taken a deep breath and started to push it out from her diaphragm but rational thought had taken hold. Or more specifically the thought of her exact current position.

She was tied to Harry's bed. She was tied to the headboard of his bed with two of his ties expertly binding her wrists to the slots behind her head. Somehow the pillows had been pushed behind her back and as she had tried to escape the bonds, she found herself instead leaning against those pillows, her back slightly arched, head resting into the downy fluff. Granted she was wearing the oldest and frumpiest jumper she had thus ruling out almost all thoughts of sexual seduction. And he'd left the TV on a cooking channel; hardly the most romantic of settings - though it stood to reason that Harry _really_ didn't know how sensual cooking could be. Otherwise he wouldn't have left her bound to his bed with all those good looking men getting it on in the kitchen.

Shaking her head, she pushed _those_ thoughts out of her head. It was best not to journey down that path at the moment. No, it was better to think about why she hadn't screamed for help. The thought of Adam, Danny or one of the others finding her tied to Harry's bed would lead to too many questions and down paths better not traveled at the moment. Besides, if anyone was going to untie her, she really hoped it was the man who's bed she currently adorned. But after an hour, what else was there to think of? How he'd slid the ties around her wrists; knots already in the silk fabric; and gently but with a sense of experience tighten the fabric until she couldn't slide free but also wasn't tight enough to cause her any pain - even as she had twisted and turned to get free. No, that only gave her two paths to journey down and neither were particularly welcome right now. Path A was trying to figure out exactly _how_ Harry had become such an expert at this particular skill and that made her think of all the other woman he may have tied to his bed in more fun pursuits. Path B was much different. That was thinking of exactly what Harry could do to her in this position; how he could put his skills to work; and that just left her frustrated in other ways. Ways she could do nothing about.

Glancing at the television, she tried to watch as someone went over making a cake but baking really wasn't her forte. Sighing, she leaned her head back against the pillows and closed her eyes, shifting slightly to try and get into a comfortable position. If she was just lying here, she minus well do something productive and take a nap. Feeling her nose itch, she crinkled it, trying to scratch it in her mind and trying to push all thoughts of Harry and this bed out.

That's how Harry found her a few minutes later; arched against his pillows with her face scrunched up in the cutest of pouts. Stepping into the room, he made his way to the bed and sat next to her feet. He watched as she opened her eyes and stared at him, her nose still twitching.

"I'm not speaking to you." Wiggling her nose, she willed it to stop itching.

"Shame." he said with a smile. "I was rather hoping you wouldn't be too mad at me."

"I'm absolutely furious with you. Tying me up and leaving me here with sexy men cooking to watch and nothing I can do about it." Squirming, she tried to work herself free, intent on exacting some revenge against him. "Now untie me."

"Do you promise not to run away." he asked, choosing to ignore her previous comment.

With a sigh, she lifted her head and met his eyes. "I promise not to run away. Just untie me. There's some...things I need to do."

Lifting an eyebrow, he lent forward. "What things?"

"Nothing that involves you. Bathroom, shower, female things - as you can see, nothing overly exciting and nothing that involves leaving the house. Now could you untie me?"

"I could do that but is it what you really want?"

"Harry." she said, warning filling her voice.

"I'll untie you in a minute. But think about this for a moment. Yes I said this isn't the time nor the place for anything to happen but..." he stopped, his voice going huskier as he slowly laid his hand against her knee, "you're obviously..._bothered_...by the situation and I could help you relieve some of the _tension_."

She shifted under the hand lying against her knee; her brain saying now was not the time for this, her body saying fuck timing, let him help. And her body was winning out. He did say he loved her and she _had_ been fantasying about this exact thing twenty minutes ago but...

"I love you Ruth." he said softly, his hand rubbing slow circles on her knee as his eyes bore into hers. "And I'll never push you for anything you're not ready for; I don't _need_ anything today except to love you. Let me love you."

"Harry." she said, her voice quieter than it had been before, her breath catching as her resolve crumbled.

"What do you want Ruth? You need to tell me what you want; I'm not going to assume anything."

"Harry _please_." she whimpered, her eyes meeting his, silently begging.

"Say it Ruth."

"Love me." her voice barely above a whisper.

Harry heard her though and he smiled, his eyes watching hers as he slid his hand down her leg slowly, fingers barely brushing the fabric of the black knit jogging pants she'd put on that morning. Reaching her foot, he carefully pulled the cotton sock off. His eyes never breaking contact, he slid down the bed and kissed the sole of her foot. At her quiet gasp, he ran his tongue along the delicate skin, his lips sliding along her toes. After a moment, he smiled at her and slid up the length of her, his body lightly pressing hers against the mattress as he ran a hand along the side of her face.

She smiled back, lying her face against his hand. Leaning forward, he pressed his mouth against hers, the smile still on his face as he slowly slid his hand down her body. She arched her back at his touch, her mouth opening in a gasp as his fingers brushed against the fabric covered skin of her stomach. Taking the opportunity, he slid his tongue between her lips caressing the warmth inside. His hand slipped lower and he paused as he reached the waistband of her pants. Pulling his mouth from hers, he met her eyes as his forehead rested against hers

"Are you sure?" he asked again, his warm breath playing against her skin.

"Please" she sighed, her lips seeking his as her eyes slid shut.

Harry leaned forward, his mouth fusing with hers as his hand slipped under the fabric and towards...

"Ruth are you alright?"

Whimpering, Ruth opened her eyes and turned towards the doorway, her breath ragged as she took in the man standing there. Confusion filled her eyes as she tried to figure out how Harry had gotten from the bed to the door without her knowing.

"Harry?" she breathed.

He stepped across the room, worry filling him. Had he tied her too tight? When he'd come up with this plan, he'd forgotten that she had had a sprained wrist not even a month ago and here he was binding her up. He'd also not planned on leaving her this long but the team had taken longer in putting a plan together than initially thought.

Adam, Fiona and Danny were currently searching the garden and surrounding area to ensure that Peter had left while Malcolm and Colin were double checking the security system. He'd felt guilty for leaving her up here so long and she'd been so quiet that he'd come to check on her. Sitting on the bed, he reached out and ran a hand through her hair.

"I'm sorry Ruth. Please forgive me."

"Harry" she growled, her eyes beating into his as embarrassment flooded her. Oh God, she could not believe what had just happened. She'd dreamed...him doing...that...to her. It had been so vivid; so real. But it wasn't; just a trick of her sleep filled mind. And now here he was, concern filling his face and his hand running through her hair.

Shifting back, he looked at her. _Really_ looked at her. And took in her flushed face, the way she'd slid down the bed, the arch of her back as she rested against the pillows, the heaviness of sleep in her eyes. And it dawned on him. Really dawned on him. He almost groaned at the image of what he could guess had just been going through her mind filled his. He'd told her this wasn't the time or the place for anything to happen but he was seriously starting to question that. They were here; together; in his bedroom and she was tied to his bed. Alright, it was a bit stalkerish if he really thought about it; especially as she hadn't had a say in the exact position; but she wasn't exactly protesting and had she really wanted to be free, all she had to do was yell. One of the others would have come running.

"Let me untie you." he finally said, he voice slightly breathless as his promise from earlier winning out in his mind.

Sliding up the bed, he reached for the ties and started to fight with the first knot. She'd moved since he'd tied them and in her shifting, she'd pulled them tight behind her head. Having no luck from where he was sitting, he sat back and looked at the situation. There was only one way he could see to get the knots undone other than cutting them and he really didn't know if it was the best of ideas. He didn't want to cut the ties though, the purple and black one _was_ one of his favorites. That settled it. Standing, he turned to kneel on the bed and looked down at her.

"Sorry about this." he said quietly, moving between her legs. Careful not to touch her in any way, he leaned up and reached for the ties. Concentrating on the material between his fingers and not on the breathless, flushed woman under him, he fiddled with the knot until it came undone. Pulling the material from the headboard, he turned towards the other one. Quickly undoing the knot, he made to move back, his hands sliding against hers briefly as he moved them for her.

Ruth watched as he lent over her, the heat from his body teasing her as he carefully avoided all contact with her. Her body tense and aching, she battled between wanting to sink into the mattress hoping it would swallow her and pressing herself up against him, finding some kind of release. As her hands came free, she watched his face as he moved away, the tense concentration not leaving his features. Body won out as she saw him swallow deeply as he went to extract himself from their compromising position.

Throwing her arms around his neck, she pulled him flush against her; lips and tongue sliding against his as she arched her body upwards against hard muscle. Not expecting her to move, he found himself falling against her soft body, pressing it down into the mattress. Hands sliding against her sides, he felt her tense as she arched against him, her back lifting off the mattress as she moaned softly into his mouth. Willing his body not to react, he continued kissing her, his hands sliding up to her shoulders. As she sagged back, her breathing erratic, she opened her eyes and met his. Embarrassment rushed through her as she realized what she had just done. Lifting a hand to her mouth, she turned her face away from his.

"Oh God, I'm so sorry Harry." she said, her voice full of shame.

Shifting until he was lying next to her on his side, he slowly reached out and turned her faces towards his. "You've nothing to be sorry for." he said quietly as his eyes finally met hers.

"But I just...and you were just...I should never have..."

Leaning forward, he gently pressed his mouth against hers, his hand caressing the side of her face. "It's alright." he said softly. "You've done nothing wrong."

"I just took advantage of you!" she said, shifting away from his touch and sitting up.

Moving until he was sitting next to her, he drew her against his side and wrapped his arms around her. She tensed at first but he didn't let go, his hand sliding down the back of her hair. "You've done no such thing." Pressing his lips against her hair, he slid his hand down her back in a comforting move. Sensing her embarrassment and needing to put her at ease, he continued. "I rather enjoyed that myself. And," he paused, feeling her tense again at his last comment, "I promised you we'd move at your pace and do what you needed. If _that's_ what you needed, then that's what you needed. You've nothing to be ashamed of, sorry for or embarrassed of. And if you need to pretend that didn't happen, then so be it. I'll go along with that just as long as you know I'm not going to _forget_ it happened."

Lifting her chin, he kissed her lightly before pulling back. Sliding off the bed, he stood and offered her his hand. He wasn't going to give her a chance to over analyze anything; not right now. Helping her up, he turned her in the direction of the bathroom.

"We've come up with a plan. Why don't you freshen up after your nap and come down so we can go over it with you."

Not trusting her voice, she nodded and turned towards the en suite. Looking back at him, she smiled slightly. "Thank you."


	17. Broken Glass

"I have a delivery for a Ms. Ruth Evershed."

The guard looked up at the man standing before him; worn jeans, a button up shirt hanging over the top of the jeans, and a battered leather coat zipped up against the cold. Nothing out of the ordinary and yet...something seems off. Looking at the box in the man's hands, he frowned. "Sorry, can't help you."

Shifting the box to his arm, the man looked at the clip board. "It says right here. Delivery for a Ms. Ruth Evershed at Thames house from a..." he paused, looking over the slip "a Mr. Harry Pearce." Seeing the guards frowning face still, the man sighed. "Look all I do is deliver them. I don't know the how or the why; I just know I was handing this box containing this vase of flowers and told to bring it here. To a Ms. Ruth Evershed. So am I delivering them to a Ms. Ruth Evershed or am I throwing them in the Thames?"

The guard swallowed, nerves getting him. They weren't supposed to except deliveries for anyone here; not without proper clearance and notification; but on the other hand, Harry Pearce _was_ the section head of Section D and if he wanted a delivery to happen, well, he could decide to do so. If he didn't accept this delivery, chances were good he'd be out of a job; even if it was against protocol. Sighing, he reached for the clipboard.

"Look, I can't let you take it up but I can sign for it and have someone take it to her."

"Hey whatever mate. I don't care how it gets there; once you sign this board, it's no longer my problem."

Handing over the box containing the vase of flowers, he took the clipboard back. "Just be careful. The roses had to come with the water already in the vase. Sure is a lucky lady."

With that, the delivery man turned and walked out the front door, a wicked smile on his face.

* * *

Ruth looked up at the woman standing in front of her. Em...something or other. Emily, Emma, Emila; she couldn't remember.

"Can I help you with something." she asked, trying desperately to remember the girls name.

"This came for you Ms. Evershed." she said timidly, in awe of actually being on the coveted Grid of Section D. Holding out the medium sized brown box, she carefully moved it to show her the flowers nestled inside.

Looking at the box, Ruth felt dread fill her. There was only one person who would send her roses. Peter. "Just...set it on the desk." she said, trying to control the shaking in her voice.

"Of course."

"Thank you Emily."

The girl smiled; the analyst knew her name! "You're welcome! Have a great day." With that, she scurried through the pods and headed back down towards reception.

Adam grinned as he looked over at Ruth from his desk. "Harry sending you flowers?"

"They're not from Harry." Ruth said quietly, standing to get a better look at the vase.

Sliding his chair over, he looked at them. "How do you know?"

"Because he'd never _send_ me flowers; he'd find a way to hide them here."

Looking at the tag on the side of the box, his grin grew. "Seems you analyst skills are off today Evershed. Says right here they're from an H. Pearce."

"What?" she asked, turning to look at the tag. Her frown deepened as she saw that it did in fact say H. Pearce in the from field.

"What'd he do now that he's sending you a dozen roses?"

Ruth blushed deeply as she thought back to that afternoon three days before. It wasn't what _Harry_ had done; it was what she'd done. And conveniently managed to avoid talking about since. If anyone should be sending an 'I'm Sorry' gift, it was Ruth. Maybe a nice bottle of his favorite liquor.

Taking in the blush, Adam grinned like a Cheshire cat. "Ohh. He _did_ do something and by the looks of it, you enjoyed it. Spill."

Turning to look at him, she didn't know if she could possibly blush any redder. Trying to maneuver the subject to something else, she raised an eyebrow in what she hoped was a questioning look. "Spill? What are we, 13 year old girls gossiping over lunch?"

"Stop trying to change the subject. Harry did something and now he's sending you roses."

"Adam." she said, a warning tone to her voice.

"Alright. Fine. I'll let it drop for now but we'll continue this interrogation at a later date."

Ruth nodded, slowly reaching into the box to pull out the large vase of flowers. They really were pretty, even if she wasn't a rose type of girl. But why was he sending her flowers. And on the grid. Lifting them closer to her face, she breathed in the scent and ran her hand down the ornament vase; the design eccentric and entirely her. Smiling, she slid her hand around the back and went to lower it to her desk when a sharp pain sliced through her hand. Gasping, she dropped the vase and pulled her hand up. As she saw the long piece of glass embedded in her palm, she heard more glass shatter and then liquid spill over her front. Looking down, she saw red seeping not only from her hand but all across the front of her shirt, the top of her desk and the floor around her.

"Ruth!" Adam half yelled, jumping up from his chair and hurrying to her side as the others on the Grid turned to look at the commotion. Grabbing her wrist in his, he quickly pulled her back and ran his hands over her sides. "Are you alright?"

"I...I think so." she said, not feeling the pain in her hand. "What is that?"

"I don't know." he said, his eyes settling on her hand. Spotting the glass, he grimaced at the wound. It wouldn't be too long before the shock wore off and she started to feel that. Sliding his arm around her waist, he carefully led her away from the destruction. Walking her towards Harry's currently empty office, he started issuing orders.

"Malcolm, Colin - I need you to start a scene at Ruth's desk. I want everything processed; that vase, the flowers, the red substance coagulating everywhere. Someone get on the phone to security and find out how they got anywhere near the grid. Someone else find out where they came from and who sent them. They're obviously not from who they say they are. Fiona I need you to get on the phone and see if you can find Harry; he needs to be made aware of the breach in security. Danny - get the staff doctor up here; fast."

As everyone went about their assigned tasks, Adam slowly and carefully led the shaking Ruth into the quiet room. The shock was starting to wear off and he could feel the fear and pain shaking in her limbs. As they crossed the threshold, her legs seemed to give out and she slowly started to sink towards the floor. Sweeping her into his arms, he carried her to the chair behind the desk and lowered her into it; knowing Harry wouldn't be bothered. Squatting down in front of her, he gripped her uninjured hand in his and met her tear filled eyes.

"It's okay Ruth."

Meeting his eyes, she started to sob uncontrollably. Was she not safe anywhere? He'd broken into her home and destroyed her belongings, he'd ripped apart the safe cocoon she'd been living in at Harry's house, and now he'd found a way to get to her at work.

Adam reached up and wrapped his arms around her, careful not to crush her injured hand. Holding her against his chest, he muttered quietly in her hair, hoping that Fiona found Harry quickly.

* * *

Harry stepped onto the grid, his face a thundercloud. He'd been in the JIC meeting when the chairman's assistant had slipped into the room and quietly told him that he was needed on the grid; that there'd been some kind of incident. No one could tell him anything else and his attempts to call had gone unanswered. To make things worse, as he'd stepped into the hall leading to the pods, he'd been greeted by a full contingent of security men demanding to see his pass before allowing him through. Just what the hell had happened in his absence.

He stopped as he took in the Grid and the color drained from his face. Stepping down the stairs, he saw a team of lab guys surrounding Ruth's desk; a mass of red pooled over top of it and on the floor. It looked like blood. Too much blood. Enough blood that one shouldn't be breathing still. Oh God, what had happened? Where was Ruth? Breath sticking in his chest, his heart stopped as he glanced around quickly and met the eyes of his core team.

Malcolm stepped forward, seeing the terror in his friend's eyes and said quietly. "She's in your office."

Nodding his thanks, Harry turned and briskly made his way down the short hall and into his office. Stopping at the threshold, he let his eyes rest on the woman sitting in his chair, the tear running down her face in streaks as the duty doctor kneeled in front of her, slowly binding off the gauze wrapped around her hand. His heart started beating again as he saw she was alive.

"I'll want to check it again in a couple of days." the doctor said quietly, quickly getting to his feet. Turning towards the man leaning against the desk beside him, he nodded towards the door. Both saw Harry standing there and quickly made their way over to him. Stepping into the hall, Harry looked past them at Ruth.

"I've given her something for the pain and the shock." the doctor said quietly, glancing back at his patient. "Physically I see no reason why she shouldn't be alright in a few weeks but I'm worried about emotionally and mentally. This is the second time in less than a month that I've had to treat her for some kind of injury. She's not used to that. Coupled with the shock she's had today and I'm worried she might break. She's currently teetering on the edge; I wouldn't recommend she be alone right now." Reaching into his bag, he pulled out three bottles. Handing them over to Adam, he continued. "She needs to take these antibiotics three times a day for the next ten days. We don't know yet what was on the glass I removed from her hand and I don't want to risk having an infection running untreated through her system. The second bottle is pain pills. She's going to need them over the course of the next few days. Make sure she eats with them otherwise they're going to make her ill. The last bottle is a sedative. Only give her one if you really think she needs it."

With that, he nodded at the other two men and made his way off the grid. Harry watched Ruth for another moment before he met Adam's eyes. "What happened?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Peter got something through security." he answered, preparing himself for the ire that was sure to come.

"What do you mean he got something through security?" Harry asked, his voice getting louder.

Ruth jumped in the chair, knocking it against the desk. Both men turned towards her and watched as she found back a fresh set of tears. Moving to go into the room, Harry paused and looked at his Section Chief. "Briefing room; twenty minutes. I want answers."

Adam nodded and moved away.

As Harry stepped into the room, he quietly closed the door. Moving across the room, he slowly lowered himself in front of Ruth and took in her appearance. Her hair was askew as tears followed a beaten path across her pale skin. She was shaking slightly as she met his eyes, her right hand cradled carefully in her lap and the shirt she was wearing was covered in what he thought was blood.

Reaching a hand out, he gently laid it against her cheek. "Ruth?"

Shaking her head, she met his eyes. "I'm alright."

"You're not alright." he said quietly, using his thumb to brush away her tears.

"I will be." she said weakly, her voice wavering. "Just give me a minute to get my thoughts together."

"Ruth - you don't have to be strong right this second."

Nodding her head yes, she lifted her left hand to brush her hair out of her face; pausing as she took in the sticky red mess on her hand. "Oh God." she managed, staring at her hand.

Harry watched the emotions filter across her face and felt his heart break a bit. Not being able to sit there any longer, he moved to the bottom drawer of his desk and pulled it open. Reaching in, he pulled out a folded shirt and tucked it under his arm. Reaching out for the blood covered hand, he grasped it in hers and gently tugged until she stood next to him.

"I need you to trust me."

Ruth looked at him, her eyes watering as she watched.

"Do you trust me?" he asked quietly, his thumb rubbing a small circle on the back of her hand.

Nodding, she felt him lead her towards the door. "Let's get you cleaned up."

* * *

Harry sat at a seat in the middle of the conference room and watched as the team filed in, each glancing at Ruth a moment before sitting. He noted that Malcolm sat on her left side and rested his hand on her arm briefly, smiling gently as she met his eyes. She returned his smile weakly and Harry was glad to see some of her color returning. For a few minutes as he'd helped her remove the soiled shirt she had been wearing, he'd been afraid of finding another injury somewhere else. But there was nothing he'd found as he'd slowly and carefully wiped away all traces of blood. She hadn't said anything as he'd cleaned her pale skin, her eyes just watching him as he slid his extra shirt over her and buttoned it up. It swam on her small frame, making her look even more fragile as he'd rolled up the sleeves. But she had smiled at him; the first time since he'd returned to the grid; and cuddled into his shirt, breathing in the scent on the fabric.

Seeing everyone had arrived, he stored those thoughts for later.

"Alright, who wants to tell me what happened?"

Adam picked up the remote and pointed it at the TV on the wall. As security footage filled the screen, he started talking.

"At approximately 2.32 a man walked in the front entrance from the street and approached security, stating he had a delivery for Ruth. Security stopped him but he was apparently prepared for this and managed to talk his way into leaving a box for Ruth. Danny's spoken with the guard who took the package and said that the man seemed disinterested in the package and indicated that it was from you Harry."

"Excuse me?" he asked, looking at the footage.

"It was a good move." Adam said quietly, continuing as he played the footage. "The guard agreed to have the package brought up to Ruth and the man slipped out the front door. CCTV caught him as he came out front."

Hitting pause, the group was greeted to a still photo of Peter, grinning as he walked into the crowd.

"At 2.45 Emily from reception brought the package up to Ruth and left it for her. Ruth was hesitant to take the package but having read the outside of the box, I told her it was from you."

Harry didn't say anything as he clenched his jaw shut and nodded for him to continue.

"Ruth pulled a vase of flowers out and was looking at them when I heard her gasp and drop the vase. By the time I turned around, there was blood everywhere. I got Ruth away from the desk and the rest of the team started processing the scene."

"We know that it's lamb blood." Malcolm spoke up from next to Ruth, opening the folder in front of him. "From what we can tell, the vase was fractured in the back so that when Ruth picked it up, she would be cut and drop the vase. This was found at the bottom of the box."

Reaching over, he handed Harry a sealed bag with a card in it, it's script large and flowing. '_I'm coming for you my darling whore._' Splatters of the lambs blood coated the card. Silently Harry handed it back to Malcolm.

"Where is Peter?"

"We don't know. CCTV has him disappearing into the crowds at the metro station. We've been unable to pick him up since. Some gentle probing at his job has found that he took a month's holiday starting last week; something he planned last month. No one knows where's he's gone though he did mention something about spending the holiday with his lady love."

"We've quietly gotten the word out to our sources that he's wanted for questioning. We've been as vague as possible as to why but we've had no luck. It's like he's disappeared from existence."

"I want him found." Harry said quietly, looking around at his team. "Until we do, Ruth goes nowhere alone."

At this, Ruth looked up at him, her eyes going wide. "Harry, that's impossible. We have real cases that need to be dealt with; not time spent babysitting me. I'll be fine."

"You're not going anywhere alone and that's final." Looking at the members of his team, he saw them all nodding. "Here on the Grid someone is always around so we don't need to worry but if she leaves the Grid, one of you goes with her if I can't."

"Harry..." she started, turning her chair to look at him.

"You're dismissed." he said, addressing the rest of the room. As they stood and gathered their things, they quietly made their way from the room, Adam sliding the door shut behind them.

"Ruth, this isn't up for discussion."

"But Harry..."

"No but Harry." Turning his chair towards her, he reached out for her hands and carefully lifted them in his. "Ruth, I stepped onto the grid earlier and thought you were _dead_. That while I was getting pissed off at being pulled out of my meeting some wacko had managed to get onto the grid and attacked you. Because that's what it looked like when I came in and saw the blood all over your desk. My heart stopped and I almost lost it. I can't go through that again; not now and not ever. So please appease me."

Seeing the emotions in his eyes, she hesitantly nodded, the need to not be a burden on the others leaving her. "Alright." she said softly.

Standing, Harry leaned over and pressed his lips against hers in a chaste kiss. Pulling back, he lifted a hand and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Thank you."

* * *

_**AN: Thank you to the faithful readers and reviewers who've kept with me so far. I really enjoy reading your reviews and thoughts on the story and I'm interested to see what you think of the latest turn of events. Peter is getting more unstable as time goes on and things are starting to boil over. It should be interesting to see how things play out as there are two possible outcomes this could take in my mind.**_

_**The prompt for this chapter was blood flowers...though I think the book more than likely meant blood colored flowers and not flowers sitting in a vase of blood.**_


	18. When You're Gone

_**AN: Thank you all for the reviews. They were all lovely. This is the first time anything I've written has reached 100+ reviews and I don't know how to thank you all. =0)**_

* * *

"Shit!"

"Ms. Evershed! I said I'd get those for you."

Ruth looked from the files scattered across the floor to the blonde rushing toward her and felt the anger boiling inside of her.

"I'm not a bloody invalid." she snapped, bending down to begin the process of gathering the papers. Awkwardly, she started stuffing them together, the gauze on her hand getting snagged on the staples more than once. Frustrated as she seemed to be making more of a mess than actually cleaning them up, she growled as the girl knelt down beside her. "I have them now back off!"

Emily stopped her hands from moving and looked at the older woman next to her, clearly shocked at the outburst. She'd only met the senior analyst a few times in the six months she'd been working with the security services but she'd always found her to be friendly when they'd met in the halls. But in the two days she'd been helping the woman, she'd been anything frosty, clearly not appreciating the extra help but she'd not been angry. Until now. And Emily didn't know what to do. Obviously she did not want to stay down in reception forever; her goal was to get into one of the sections and work. When she'd been called into her bosses office on Wednesday morning, she'd been shocked to find Harry Pearce sitting behind the desk waiting for her. She'd heard what had happened the day before; all of Thames House had; and for few seconds, she'd been afraid she was going to be fired or worse. But he'd surprised her when he asked if she'd be interested in helping out in his department for a couple of weeks; just until his Analyst was able to type and file again. While it wasn't the most interesting of positions, it meant she could show what she could do and perhaps get out of reception and onto a team somewhere in the Security Services

Now though, she wasn't too sure if she'd still have a job when this was all over. She knew that her main job was the keep the other woman happy, calm, and not let her lift a thing. From the moment she'd stepped onto the Grid to begin her job, she'd sensed that wouldn't be as easy as it sounded and she'd been right. With a sigh, she started gathering the papers again, trying to ignore the glare the other woman was throwing at her.

"I'm sorry Ms. Evershed."

Before she could get another word in, Adam stepped over and gently lifted Ruth from the mess, her elbow in his hand.

"Ruth, let Emily take care of this."

Yanking her elbow from him, she turned and glared. "I am not made of glass and I don't need you all hovering."

Reaching down, she grabbed the files from the younger woman and turned to go back to her desk, the files slipping from her grip again. Adam reached out and pushed them up into her arms. Tears glistened in her eyes as Adam took them and handed them to Emily.

"Thanks Emily. Why don't you take those to registry and sort them out."

With a grateful smile, Emily held the files to her chest and hurried out of the room.

Turning to look at Ruth, he sighed before walking to her desk and pulling out her chair. As he waited for her to sit down, he wished; not for the first time; that they could just find the man tormenting her. She'd been holding up remarkably well all things considered but he could see the frustration at being taken care of and never having a moment alone was getting to her. The addition of her right hand being out of commission and her left not entirely up to par coupled with the solid thirty-six hours on the grid for the latest crisis, she was ready to snap. They'd all been watching the tension build up and he'd finally made a decision. With Harry at Whitehall until who knew when, he'd called Mike and asked if he minded terribly taking Ruth back to Harry's and staying with her until Harry or one of them showed up to stay with her. He'd agreed and was waiting downstairs for her. Now all that was left was for Adam to get Ruth off the grid.

"Get your things together, you're going home." he said quietly, watching as her shoulders slumped.

"We're not done all the paperwork for the..."

"Ruth, you're going home. We've got the paperwork covered; there's nothing else for you to do here." He paused a moment and watched her face drop even more. "At least for tonight."

"I can help." she said, her chin going up stiffly.

"We all know you can but..." he stopped for a minute, racking his brain. "Harry doesn't know when he's going to get out of his meetings and he'd like for you to go home and see to Scarlet. Something about the neighbor has plans tonight and can't keep her?"

"You've talked to Harry?"

Nodding, Adam breathed a sigh of relief as she fumbled with the computer. She was having a hell of a time trying to turn it off with only one hand able to type. Reaching over, he logged it off for her and grabbed her bag. "He called about twenty minutes ago; told me to have everyone wrap things up and head home till the morning. Asked that I have Mike take you home and stay with you till he gets there and for you to get Scarlet." He was lying of course but it stood to reason he'd get a chance to talk to Harry before Ruth did and could fill him in on the plan.

Looking back at him, she met his eyes for a moment before nodding. "Alright."

* * *

"I've just got to run in, get the post and then we can head to the house."

Climbing from the car, Mike looked around before opening the back door and helping his charge out. His hand on her back, he led her up the path, his eyes wandering from side to side. As they neared the middle of the path, he felt something come down over the back of his head before blacking out and falling to the ground.

Ruth gasped and turned, coming face to face with the sadistic grin on Peter's face. Before she had time to scream, he smacked the butt of the gun into the side of her head, his arms going out to catch her as she slumped towards the ground.

Smiling, he swept her effortlessly into his arms, her head falling into his shoulder. Walking down the empty street, he stopped by an SUV and maneuvered her into one arm. Grabbing the handle, he opened the door and slid her into the seat. Leaning into the car, he clicked the seat belt into place before pausing, his hand brushing the hair from her face. As his fingers lingered on her cheek, he lowered his head and pressed his mouth against her still one. Standing up, he closed the door and quickly made his way to the driver's side. Climbing in, he started the engine and turned toward his quiet companion.

"Time for us to be going home my darling."

* * *

It was utter chaos as two cars stopped on the crowded street. From the first, two men jumped out and quickly made their way towards the man exiting the other. All three turned to watch as fire destroyed the house before them, silence settling for a minute. As the sound of timber crashing to the ground with a sharp splinter, Harry turned towards the others.

"What the hell happened?"

Adam looked at Danny before answering. "We don't know; the call came into the Grid about forty minutes ago from the local police department. The address flagged in their computer systems as being one of ours and they called straight away."

"Have you told Ruth yet?"

"Errr...no, Mike was taking her home..."

Before he could finish, Harry's eyes settled on the figure in the back of an ambulance and the color drained from his face. Turning Adam and Danny saw the same thing Harry did; Mike was wrapped in a blanket, gauze wrapped around his head and Ruth was nowhere to be seen. Looking at the other two, Harry frowned.

"Where's Ruth?"

* * *

_**AN: Well, we're getting closer to the end; I'm thinking one or two more chapters until this story is done. But I've got a sequel brewing in my mind so hopefully that won't be too far behind this. Living across the pond, I do have some questions though for any of the readers who may be from England...just some little things to work with ideas before finishing this and beginning said sequel. If you might be interested in helping me - let me know.  
**_

_**The prompt for this was funny enough irritable which perfectly describes my mood today after seeing my very own Harry briefly before getting a hug and him disappearing for lunch with his much younger and prettier girlfriend than coming home to finding out the AC unit in my apartment went kaput in our first 98 degree day of the year. It's 8 PM and it's still 91 degrees - blah. Must write though even if I am whiny. I promise the next chapter will be better...if I have to write it from the freezer!**_


	19. I'll Be The River

Her first thought as she slipped into a thin veil of consciousness was that the world was swaying. Back and forth, back and forth; a constant rocking motion that continued on uninterrupted. As she became more aware, she heard the pitter patter of rain against wood and of a constant throbbing in her head. Groaning, she opened her eyes and blinked at the brightness of the light. Looking around, she tried to remember where she was but the paneled walls and expensive looking furniture weren't familiar. Going to move her arms she found her movement restricted and looked down, realizing for the first time that something was majorly wrong. There was no way she could have tied herself to a straight backed chair and somehow it didn't seem like something Harry would do without asking first. He was more the silk tie type person; not the rough hemp that was currently binding her. Pushing her shoulders forward, she tried to maneuver herself free to no avail. Sagging back in the chair, she closed her eyes briefly; the pain in her head causing her to wince.

"You're awake." she heard softly from her right.

Opening her eyes again, she turned her head; wincing as the movement caused the room to spin a little. Now that her eyes had adjusted to being opened, she could see that it in fact wasn't as bright as she had originally thought but rather was a dimly lit cabin of some type, all wood and heavy furniture. Turning her head towards the voice she saw Peter leaning against the open doorway; his hands resting against the dark jeans he wore and a smile on his face.

"Where are we?" she asked quietly, the pounding in her head pulsating.

Stepping from the door, he moved across the room and picked something up a counter. Turning back towards her, he stopped next to her and laid whatever he was holding against her temple. After a moment she felt a bit of relief as coldness pressed against the pain. Squatting next to her, he held the ice pack against her head with one hand and used the other to brush a stray hair from her face.

"We're home my dear." he said, his fingers resting gently against her skin. "And I owe you an apology."

"Www...what for?" she asked, surprised that he was realizing what he was doing was wrong.

"I've been watching you."

"I know." she said quickly.

Lifting his finger, he pressed it against her lips and continuing as if he hadn't heard her. "I thought you were like all the others; that the shyness was an act to lure me into thinking you were someone different. And once you got what you wanted, you'd turn into a whore like the rest and have to be dealt with. But you're not." A grin settled against his face. "You're my pure angel; the one I've been waiting for my entire life. My mother always promised me that one day I'd meet my soul mate; I'd just have to find her by ridding the world of its whores. And she was right. I saw that watching you closely these past few days; innocent in so many ways. And I knew we were destine to be together forever."

"Peter you're..."

"No my darling, you don't need to speak. Everything will be alright now that I've gotten you away from those trying to brainwash you into thinking I'm evil." Moving his hand from her face, he touched her gauze covered hand. "I'm so sorry for hurting you. I thought you were like the others; that you needed to be punished and shown who's boss but I was wrong."

Ruth looked at the man before her. He wasn't the same person she had meant three months ago. Or maybe he was and she had failed to see it. It hadn't been a great time for her. But she'd like to think her judgment wasn't so bad that she'd miss the crazy bit lurking beneath the surface. Of course, the night he had introduced himself was the night she'd found Juliet and Harry having sex in his hallway..._Harry_. The name filtered through her mind. She didn't know how long she'd been unconscious but surely he had to be out of his meeting at Whitehall and on his way home. He'd have to find out she was missing and than what would he do? Would he look for her or would he think she'd managed to slip off like she'd wanted to do that day she'd used him for...

"What are you thinking about my sweet? You look far away"

Blinking, she focused on Peter. It wouldn't do her any good to think about Harry now. She needed to get free; get away from Peter and get help. But first she needed to know where she was.

"My head hurts." she said, thinking of the first honest thing that popped into her mind. "It's making it difficult to concentrate. I'm sorry."

Standing, he moved the ice pack from her head and ran his fingers through her matted hair. She watched as he moved his hand away and saw the wet blood covering them. Cringing, she wondered what it was about this man that made her bleed. _'Oh right.'_ the thought mocked her, almost saying duh.

"It's alright. Once we're free of this place everything will be alright. You won't be confused anymore."

"Where are we going?"

"Away where no one can find us and pull us apart like they've been trying. We can be together and be happy. You've nothing to worry about. I've get everything already set up. We'll leave as soon as this storm is over." he said, glancing towards the darkened window. "And by morning; when we've reached the sea; I'll take you for a walk on the deck."

Fear gripped her. They were on a boat. If they left wherever they were moored right now Harry and the others would never find her. She had to get free. But how?

He stood, his hands gripping the ice pack as he walked it to a sink under the window. Setting it inside, he leaned over and looked into the darkened night. "It should pass within the hour my love and then we'll be on our way." He turned back to her then, a smile strung across his face.

"Pppeter?"

"Yes Jamie?"

She paused for a moment, confusion rippling through her. _'Jamie?'_ "Peter it's Ruth."

"Oh no, not anymore. I never liked that name. Jamie was so much better for you. And when we settle into our new life, it'll be better if you're Jamie anyways. That way the others won't find us."

"Right." she said shakily, watching as he moved back towards her.

"Can I get you anything while we're waiting?"

"I..." she racked her brain trying to think of _something_; anything; that would get her free of these ropes. And then it hit her. "I'm a bit embarrassed" she said, flushing, her voice dropping. "But I need to use the restroom."

* * *

Malcolm and the others looked up from their stations as the pods swished open and Harry stepped through; Adam and Danny following behind. Walking quickly across the room, Harry stopped by the computer techs computer.

"Anything?"

"Not yet but we're looking."

"What do you mean nothing yet? It's been almost an hour since I called. She could be anywhere!" His voice rising, he slammed his palms down on the desk.

"Harry calm down." Adam said, walking over to put his arm on the other man's shoulder. "They're looking for her."

"We've got hours of footage to go through on the four cameras that are on Ruth's street. And they're the old ones; not fully digitized so it's slowing things down." Malcolm knew he was worried; they all were; but they had to be thorough and make sure they didn't miss anything.

"He's had her for three hours. Do you know what he can do to her in three hours?" He paused a moment, looking between them all. "I'll tell you what. He could torture her, hurt her in more ways than he already has, he could...rape her," his voice faltered a bit on that before he finished "or he could kill her. Hell, he could do all that and more before we get one ounce of information as to where they're at."

"Harry..."

"No. She may be a desk spook but she is one of us; part of the family; and we're going to make sure she's saved, do everything in our power. Like we would for any field agent."

"I've got it!"

All eyes turned to Colin as he clicked a button on his mouse. Striding around the desk, Harry leaned over the younger man's shoulders and watched as a Lexus pulled up onto the street in front of Ruth's house. They watched as the car sat there for a minute, idling before the driver's door opened and Mike stepped out. There was almost a five minute delay before the man finished looking around the area, seemingly happy enough that nothing sinister was lurking in the shadows. They watched as he reached for the back door and opened it, his hand reaching in to assist Ruth out of the seat. And from the angle of the camera, they saw the shadow slip out of the window of the house and into the hedges in front. The two hadn't stood a chance from the ambush that awaited and Harry knew as much as he wanted too, he couldn't blame his driver for what had happened. As much as he'd like to think he would have sensed the blow coming, he knew that was a lie. His heart clenched as he saw the terror on Ruth's face as she came face to face with her tormentor; as the butt of the gun collided with her temple and she fell towards the ground.

The camera lost sight of them as Peter walked off down the street; an unconscious Ruth in his arms. Colin switched cameras and pulled the feed for the one further down the street; thankful that it was digital. Queuing the correct time, they saw as the man set Ruth into the front seat of an SUV and buckled her in. Pausing the video for a moment, Colin zoomed in and re-focusing the image. The license plate came into focus and Malcolm ran the numbers through another program, trying to find the number on any traffic cameras around the city for the last three hours. While the program ran, Colin resumed the video and they watched as the man kissed her before closing the door. As the vehicle drove away and visible flames start lapping at Ruth's house, the program gave them their answer. The last known location of the SUV.

* * *

Dizzy and a bit unsteady on her feet, Ruth stood at the small sink in the bathroom, the water running as she tried to come up with an escape plan. It had taken some reasoning and some cajoling before Peter would leave her in the room by herself. But as she'd explained; she wasn't comfortable being in that position with anyone - even him. At first he had refused, telling her she could wait until they were out to sea but she'd kept talking, telling him she wouldn't ask if she really didn't have to go. And then she'd pointed out that with how she was feeling, she wouldn't get very far and she'd need his help going to and from the room. Finally he'd relented and slowly begun undoing the ropes. But her chance for freedom hadn't come; not yet. As he'd untied her with one hand, his other had wrapped around her waist holding her in place. When he was done, he'd lifted her up; refusing her request to walk and slowly carried her to a room down a dark hall. Stopping outside a door, he'd set her inside before stepping back and leaving her alone. As she'd turned to look around the room she realized there was no other way out except past him. And he wasn't leaving

Now she could hear him pacing outside waiting for her. Any minute now he'd be knocking on the door, asking her if she was done. And she couldn't tell him no. He'd get suspicious if he wasn't already so. Turning off the water, she picked up a towel and dried her hands. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath before letting her shoulders droop. Resting a hand against the porcelain of the sink, she reached out for the knob and slowly opened the door. Taking a shaky step out, she lifted her eyes to those of the man pacing.

"I'm sorry" she said weakly, her hand reaching out for his arm. "It was more difficult than I thought."

She heard the gentle sigh as he wrapped his arm around her waist and she saw the smile settle over his face. "It's alright darling. There's no need to apologize. Let's get you back to your chair."

"Couldn't we get some air first? I...I...I'm not feeling very well."

He stopped their progress down the hall and looked at her, a frown settling onto his face. "You're not lying to me are you?"

"No." she said quickly.

"Because if you are, I'm going to be very angry and you won't like the consequences."

Shaking at his look, she sucked in a shallow breath before continuing. "I'm truly not feeling well Peter. I've very lightheaded and nauseas and this warm, dry air is not helping me feel any better. You said it was raining out. Which means it'll be much cooler and easier to breath in the damp air. And hopefully I won't feel so sick to my stomach."

His eyes seemed to dig into hers and she hoped that she was showing the right amount weariness in them. If he didn't believe her she'd be back to that hard chair; tied up with no chance of escaping. But if he walked her to the deck...maybe just maybe she could distract him and get away. Find help. Find Harry. She must have played everything right before his face changed and a grin fell over his features.

"I'm sorry. You're right. We need to make sure you're all well for our journey." His arm tightening around her waist, he lead her back into the room they'd been in. Walking past the chair, he stopped at a heavy door and pulled it open. "But it's cold out here so only for a moment. I don't want you getting the flu."

Nodding, she kept looking forward as they stepped into the misty spray of the night. Fighting back the shiver that hit her as the cold air rushed over her, she let him walk her onto the deck. In the distance she could see the lights of London, glowing bright against the winter sky. Around them, most of the other boats were dark but every now and then one showed signs of life. As they stepped further away from the door, she let her weight fall more against him, making him think that she was weaker then she really was. Reaching the side railing, she reached out and gripped the wood, her fingers curling around it. With the hand not wrapped around her waist he reached out and tucked a loose stand of hair behind her ear.

"Better?" he muttered.

Lifting her face towards his, she forced a smile onto her lips as she nodded. "Yes. My stomach is starting to settle a bit already."

He nodded, leaning down to press his lips against her forehead. She fought the shudder that bubbled up and instead leaned into his touch. "Thank you for taking care of me."

That was the right thing to say because suddenly he smiled; a real smile; and he stepped back, his arm dropping from around her waist. Reaching out, he picked up one hand from the railing and pressed his lips against it. "I will take care of you forever Jamie. We'll leave this place soon and sail to the Bahamas' to be married. Then we can set off on an adventure around the world."

"Married?" she asked, shock filling her voice.

He frowned, his grip on her hand tightening. "Yes, married."

"But Peter. I...I don't have my passport or my birth certificate. It won't be legal."

"Don't you think I've thought of all that. It's taken care of."

"Oh." she said, trying to let relief she wasn't feeling filter through her voice.

"Don't you want to get married? Or are you like the others?"

"Oo...of course I want to be married. Bbbut I couldn't..." she paused, trying to think of the right word, "cope if it wasn't legal. It wouldn't feel right to me."

He pressed his lips against her hand again and smiled. "I'm a solicitor. I've taken care of making sure we have all the proper documentation needed and found the perfect country with the least requirements. Trust me - it will be legal."

Setting her hand back on the railing, he looked up at the sky and smiled.

"The storm has passed enough that we can leave."

Nodding, she tightened her grip on the railing. Time was running out. What was she going to do.

"Let's get you back inside so I can get us started on our journey."

"Couldn't I stay out here with you?"

"You'll be much more comfortable inside darling."

She nodded her agreement but lifted her eyes to his. "I might but...I don't want to be alone right now. I'm still not feeling that well and I'm afraid something might happen."

He paused in thought, his eyes running over the deck before he slowly nodded his consent. "Alright. Once we're out to sea I'll anchor us and we can go in so you can get some rest. I've a cabin all ready for you. I think you'll love it. I modeled it on your bedroom at home and there's even an intercom that will stay on while you're in there so you've only to call out for me."

Stepping back, he made his way up a small flight of stairs and into a covered cabin. "Hold on tightly now."

With that, he turned a key and the engines started. Ruth gripped the railing with her left hand until her knuckles turned white, fear gripping her. Her chances for getting away slipping further and further from her grasp. As the boat slowly backed up, she saw flashlights sweeping across the dock; moving towards the slip they'd just left. Her finger nails digging into the wood as the boat slowly started to turn, she saw four figures step into the overhead light.

"HARRY!" she screamed, relief filling her as she realized they'd found her. "HARRY!" she cried again, tears running down her face.

"You lying whore!" she heard roared behind her and turned as Peter stepped out of the cabin, the boat coming to a rocking halt. Pressing back against the railing, her breath came quick as he rushed down the stairs and towards her.

"NO!" she said stepping back. "Get away from me."

He didn't listen, fury filling his face as he rushed at her. "You fucking whore. You're just like the others!" with that, he backhanded her across the face.

As her head twisted to the side, she tasted blood. Lifting her hands from the railing, she reached towards him, pushing him back as he lifted his hand again. But the gauze covering her injury didn't give her much give and he managed to knock her off balance. Slipping a little, she moved to the side and fought to regain her footing. Anger fueled him as he followed, his hands going out for her throat. As his fingers wrapped around her throat she clawed at his hands trying to pry them off. Gasping for breath, she felt darkness surrounding her and with the last of her strength, she kicked her foot out, connecting with his leg and fell backwards, over the railing and into the cold, dark water below.

* * *

_**AN: I know, not a very nice place to end but we're nearing the end and one last dramatic pause before the journey closes. This didn't actually end how I had planned; it took a sharp turn to the right with that vase of flowers Peter sent and went on a totally different path. One I didn't see coming ... which kind of messes with the sequel I started planning out. But we shall have to see what happens with the last chapter which hopefully I can write tomorrow. I've a date with my couch and Series 2/3 DVDs that have arrived from the UK of Spooks.**_

_**Thank you all for your reviews! Now the question is...do they get to Ruth in time?**_


	20. I'm In Love

As he stepped away from the Police Captain he was talking to, he saw Ruth standing on the edge of the dock, his coat wrapped tightly around her. The rain that had been falling all night was slowly turning to snow and he shivered a little as some made its down the back of his neck. Hands stuffed in his trouser pockets, he stepped over to her, his shoulder just lightly pressing into hers.

She knew he was there; took comfort in the light pressure of his shoulder against hers; but she stayed silent for a few minutes, watching the wet flakes land on the river. Pulling his coat tighter, she breathed in the scent of his aftershave before speaking softly. "You know, I keep waiting to wake up and find out this was all a dream."

"More like a nightmare." he said, turning his head slightly to watch her.

"Hmmm."

Turning back towards the water, he continued. "But it's over now Ruth. Special Forces have him in custody, they're taking him in and he's never going to get near you again. Not after what they've managed to find on his past."

"He may not be able to but that doesn't mean someone else won't be there to follow in his foot steps." she said softly, her shoulders sagging a bit as she continued. "Do you know this is the second time in a year that someone I've gone out to dinner with has abducted me?"

"You've had dinner with me." he said softly, trying to lighten her mood.

It seemed to work as she chuckled but he wasn't expecting what came out of her mouth next. "I'm sorry, the third time."

He turned and looked at her again, rarely seen shock and confusion spreading across his features.

"You tied me to your bed with your neck ties Harry and refused to let me leave." Finally turning to look at him, she met his eyes.

"Because you were going to do something stupid!" Running his hand across his face, he sighed and looked out at the water. "At the time, it seemed like my best option."

Her voice raising slightly, she followed his gaze back out to the river. "You couldn't have tried reasoning with me?"

"Right - like that would have worked. You were being highly irrational at the time. Talking about packing your things and moving to a hotel. Rational conversation didn't seem like something that you were capable of."

"I was trying to protect you!"

"Well so was I." he paused a moment and turned back to look at her. "Ruth; these last few months; I'd do it all again."

Finally turning towards him, she lifted her eyebrow. "Everything? Even sleeping with Juliet?"

"God no - that was the second biggest mistake of my life." Pulling his gaze from the water, he met her eyes. "Let me rephrase that. Everything I've done for you sans Juliet I'd do again." Pausing, he sighed quietly and hesitantly lifted his hand before continuing. "I know I've screwed up and I know had I not screwed up, this whole Peter mess might not have happened. I was going to ask you to coffee that afternoon so many months ago and I like to think that had I not fucked up, you would have said yes. And I know these last few months haven't been the greatest but I'd like to think something good might have come out of all this."

She watched the hand hovering between them, wondering what he was going to do. "What's that?" she asked softly.

Meeting her eyes, he moved his hand the last couple of inches and ran it through her hair, finally letting it come to rest against the back of her head. "I love you."

She smiled, leaning into his touch. "That's the first time you've told me that when I wasn't tied up."

He smiled back and pulled her closer, their bodies almost touching. "I'd like to tell you that everyday if you'll let me. I know you're going to need time to process all that's happened, to get over what Peter's done. I'm not asking you to rush into anything but I'd like for you to give us a chance somewhere down..."

Standing on her tippy toes, she leaned up and pressed her mouth softly against his. His arms wrapped around her automatically as she pulled back. He looked down at her in shock yet again, momentarily stunned silent. "Harry, shut up. I don't want to spend the next ten years waiting for something to change and wondering what if. Yes, we have a lot to talk about and I am going to need some time to work through everything that's happened, but I want to do it together."

He couldn't stop the grin that spread across his face as he pulled her closer, pressing her against his chest. Leaning down, he kissed the top of her damp hair. "I'd like that."

Laughing as she wrapped her arms around his middle, she let her head rest against his chest. "There's just one other thing." she said softly.

"Whatever it is, you can have it."

Lifting her face to look at his, she smiled. "Can we go home?"

* * *

_**AN: Well, that's the end. I've only written and re-written it about five different times before finally deciding that it was awful. This is the little bit I decided to keep. Plans for the sequel are under way though I'm still debating whether it'll be like this one and include writing prompts or something different. Input is openly wanted and begged for.**_

_**Thank you to all that have read this as I struggled to find my creative footing again. Your insight, opinions, reviews and encouragement have all meant a lot to me and I don't think I would have taken it this far without it. So I humbly thank you all for reading.  
**_


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